Today, I overheard my daughter talking to her boyfriend over the phone about having sex. She said, "You have to piss on me to get me pregnant, that's what I heard anyway." She's 16. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I overheard my mom giving my 6-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, I overheard my 11-year-old son giving my 8-year-old daughter the sex talk. FML
Today, my 17-year-old son managed to easily convince my 13-year-old daughter that if you have sex before getting married, you'll instantly get horrible diseases that will kill you. Her freaking out is how I found out she's not only gullible as hell, but sexually active as well. FML
Today, my 16-year-old cousin told me she was "late." When I asked if she could be pregnant, she said no, because, "You can't get pregnant the first time you have sex." I ended up having to give her the sex talk. FML
Today, I sat down with my daughter to have the sex talk, because she recently started seeing a guy. I mentioned at one point how disappointed I would be if she got pregnant. She went wide-eyed and asked, "Didn't mom tell you?" FML
Today, I found out that my daughter not only has a boyfriend, but that they're trying for a baby. She's barely 15. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, despite spending literal years educating my son about safe sex and warning him not to do something stupid like get a girl pregnant at 16, he actually surpassed my expectations. He got her pregnant at 17. Plus she gave him a nasty STD. FML
Today, not only did I find out that my 13 year-old daughter is pregnant, I found out that she did it on purpose "to prove that she’s responsible." FML
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
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Top comments
glimmer980 20
I think you need to have the birds and the bees talk before she does end up pregnant
ComoEsJuan 24
The birds and the pees. Wait...
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Comments (183)
limabeans101029 21
Are you absolutely sure she wasn't joking around, repeating something she'd heard someone else say, quoting a tv show, etc.? If she was being serious, give her some sex ed., pronto!
iLostMyName10127 5
Ydi because as her parent you should have thought her about sex and about safe sex so she doesn't believe these stupid things.
Peter_Ohnigian 14
Are you a male mother?
smokecloud_ 37
I've been waiting for this comment... male symbol, username SadMother... so much confusion...
FaultInMyStars 11
I thought I was the only one who noticed.
vikky538 29
why is she talking about having pregnant at 16 you should have a serious talk with her
Luluthus 41
I understood it as the daughter trying NOT to get pregnant. As in "as long as you don't piss on me, we'll be fine." But then again, teenagers do dumb shit all the time.
ThatAmericanGirl 5
You're her mom? Nobody's fault but yours that she doesn't know.
thes7274473 19
Why does your gender say male and your name say "Sad Mother"
inseenglish 9
go talk with that guy...
g007_fml 5
I'm hoping she heard wrong and her daughter said **** in me. Could sound like piss on me.
Luluthus 41
That does make more sense, and is closer to the truth.
sydneysays 15
That's just terrifying
rushalm 7
Congratulations! You raised a pussy!
Luluthus 41
He raised a daughter, so tecnically he raised a person WITH a pussy.