Today, I noticed a stray string on a seam of my pants. I started absentmindedly pulling at it thinking maybe I could pull it off. Five minutes later, I realized it looked like I was fiddling with my crotch in the middle of Starbucks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Today, I decided to wear string panties. While in line at the mall, they became untied. I was wearing a skirt. FML
Today, I ripped my old, worn underwear while trying to pick a wedgie in public. Half ended up in my hand. FML
Today, I went for a job interview. While waiting to be called in, I noticed a tiny thread hanging from my shirt. I pulled it to fix it but almost unraveled half my sleeve before the interviewer walked in. I spent 30 minutes holding my arm against my side like I was hiding evidence. FML
Today, I grabbed a pair of pants from the dryer in a hurry, trying to make it to the bank. When I rushed in, I felt something fall down my leg. It was a pair of my mom's granny panties that had been stuck inside my jeans. I kicked them aside, hoping no one would notice. They did. FML
Today, I was absentmindedly playing with a piece of lint. When I looked at it, I realized that I had been rolling and squeezing a dead spider in my fingers for about five minutes. FML
Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML
Today, I was at work and caught my pants on the corner of the door hinge. They tore completely open and my hairy cheek was exposed for the whole office to see. FML
Today, I was walking out of work. I felt like everyone was staring at me but brushed it off. It wasn't until I got home that I realized I had toilet paper sticking out of my pants. FML
Today, I was at the grocery store. I bent to get some dog food off the bottom shelf and felt my pants tear. My jeans split right across the back seam, showing everyone I was wearing a pink thong under them. I had to ditch my cart and leave as I had no way to cover myself. FML
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Top comments
Bakarra 22
Hey at least you weren't also squeezing your nipple trying to lower the volume on your iPod...
counterfit 10
"A mermaid spreading her legs" Think about that for a second.
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Comments (45)
perdix 31
You were fiddling with your crotch in the middle of Starbuck's. "Pulling it off" is the new "rubbing one out," I guess.
sugarshane007 20
That is a whole new way to strip OP! Taking it all off one string at a time, you vivacious fox!
grumpybr 13
I'd think the FML crowd would be a little more aware of their surroundings considering there a bunch of "I thought I was alone, I didn't realize" type of stories here.
still_guns 16
How the hell is this YLS?
chanellgymnast 17
Oh no, not at Starbucks..
zilla52 12
way to go op play with yourself. at Starbucks
fadbad2 4
I have seen women "dj'ing" more than once at Starbucks, although they were all reading 50 shades it gray...
marlenoysis 7
Best FML in a while. Cracked me up! Lol
alison98hp 8
That's happened to me before! Except I was sitting in class picking dog hair off my pants....
amifaiyaz 12
That sexy Starbucks mermaid...