Today, I met my mom's new business partner for the first time. I shook his hand, and introduced myself as "Lisa's daughter." I'm a guy. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I met my boyfriend's mom for the first time. I introduced myself and went to shake her hand. She looked me up and down and said, "I don't shake hands with whores." FML
Today, I met my mom's fiancé. He's a nice guy, he's also my wife's dad. I'll soon call my wife my sister. FML
Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML
Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend’s parents for the first time. As I went to shake her dad’s hand, my nervous, sweaty palm slipped right off and I ended up tapping him on the wrist. He gave me the most judgmental look while I awkwardly apologized and wiped my hand on my pants. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time, and from what I'd heard he's super strict and uptight. I go in for the firm handshake after introducing myself while looking him in the eyes and I accidentally grabbed his junk. FML
Today, my mom started her new job; she's now my new coworker. She's already told the other girl I'd said she talks too much, and has berated me for not calling her "Mom" while at work. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, my dad introduced me to my half-sister. He'd only recently found out that he had another daughter by another woman, and had only just met her. She and I have been in the same class in school for the past three years. FML
Today, I finally let my parents meet a boyfriend of mine for the first time ever. My dad mentioned how he was happy to finally meet him, because for the past 4 years he'd thought I was gay. FML
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Top comments
metallica_wins 20
Giving some mixed messages as a first impression. Bold, indeed.
ThatsMyPie 20
To be trans- or not to be trans-, that is the question.
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Comments (63)
abbey728 16
This made me spit my coffee
worldclassrager 41
That happens just a slip of the tongue...
pwnman 33
Lisa's daughter's brother!
nutellaforlyfe 3
Your fault. Your mistake. Your doing. YDI.
Angeuh_fml 21
If you really want to be a Princess then ... ok, you can wear my pink dress ^^
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Freudian slip?
TheMystery13 13
I think this is a great thing to do intentionally, because you can follow it up by referring to EVERYONE with the wrong gender pronouns in this guy's - or gal's - presence. It'll keep his gears grinding.
holliepong 8
maybe he'll just think that you're humorous! be positive, man!
Ali_Br_fml 33
The same thing happened to me (except vice versa) My brother was introducing me to his girlfriend, and in the mix between saying I'm his little sister, and he's my big brother, I said I'm his little brother... We laughed it off. I bet so will her partner.
toy911 9
Identity crisis?