Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat beside me. She started clipping her toenails. Disgusted by it, I turned and opened my mouth to tell her to move somewhere else, just as one flew inside my mouth. FML
Today, I was eating nacho chips with my nieces when I started to feel that some were wet. I look at my niece and notice she was sucking on the chips, and putting them back in the bag. FML
Today, I made a sandwich. When I went to grab chips, my wife snatched it. I made a second sandwich. My son came in and stole the plate when I was grabbing a seltzer. I went to make a third sandwich. No more cold cuts. FML
Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, so I made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informed me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML
Today, I was babysitting my niece when we decided to play hide and seek. I went in the shed, and waited. After waiting a while, I went to go back inside to see what was happening. I saw my niece had locked all the doors and was eating cookies on the kitchen bench. FML
Today, my dad was making a sandwich in the kitchen. Hungry, I snuck in and grabbed it, running back to my room and devouring it. Later at dinner, he dumped a whole scoop of rice in my lap. We all ended up laughing as we cleaned it. FML
Today, my wife packed my lunch. Inside of my lunchbox was a photo of her eating my sandwiches. FML
Today, I had a fight with my little sister. Later she apologized and made me dinner to make up for it. I thought it was pretty good until I found out that instead of using Parmesan cheese in the recipe, she used foot shavings from her Ped Egg. FML
Today, I opened my lunch at work to discover that my sandwich was a soggy mess. The Tupperware I'd put it in was a piece of crap, and all the mayo had leaked out. I tried to salvage it but then spilled the whole thing in my lap. I ended up eating my lunch with a plastic fork, and even my fingers, like an angry animal. FML
Today, I found my sister licking all of the silverware and putting it back in the drawer. FML
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Top comments
Miss_Michaela 10
You need to 'trainer' on how to throw food she's not gonna eat into the bin. ;) Or the compost heap. Hopefully she won't have to 'sneaker' food into hiding places. I'm sure the food was 'boot'iful. Have a 'converse'ation about it, but don't let it turn 'ugg'ly. And all will be well... ington.
ladiesman219 4
lol something tells me your a bad lunch maker
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Comments (70)
joycelynnmicheal 0
Wow tht stinks
ariellesXurXboss 0
You should have made a better samwitch.
miksoko 0
I don't get why people freak out about this! Sometimes people don't like the food, or aren't hungry. It's not a judgement on who prepares it
Iloveepicfails 0
kids rock!
Sheer_1diot 5
so you made a sandwich for your niece anyway?