Today, I made a patient really happy. I work in a long term care facility and was changing a woman's diaper. While cleaning her, I somehow managed to give her an orgasm with a warm wash cloth. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I made a nursing home resident laugh so hard that he had a heart attack. FML
Today, I spent the first two hours of my shift cleaning up liquid poo after an elderly lady sat in one of our chairs and promptly let go of her bowels. I was so embarrassed for her that I even bought her a towel, underwear, and a pair of pants. She then thanked one of my coworkers for all the help. FML
Today, at work where I'm a physiotherapist, I was helping a patient with lower back pain. While I was massaging him, he shat himself. FML
Today, I was helping my elderly dementia client with her toilet. I reached in both front and back to pull up her pants for her. "Not too hard, nice and easy..." she said with a weird smile. I looked over to see I was actually pulling her nipple. FML
Today, I was cleaning one of my disabled clients because he pooped himself, so I started to undress him for a shower. I took his dirty diaper off and set it on his bed, then I bent over to take off his socks at which point he put the diaper on my head like a hat. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at work at a nursing home. While reaching for the toilet paper, I accidently pushed the emergency button. The nursing supervisors broke into the washroom to help. FML
Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML
Today, while volunteering at a senior care center, I witnessed a woman begin to remove her trousers. Then she began tearing apart her diaper. She then began to explore her body. I was unable to stop her. FML
Today, I made an attempt to be nicer to customers at my job as instructed, which resulted in me listening to a handful of elderly people's incontinence issues, and a meth-addict's multiple abortions in detail. FML
Today, while working as a paramedic, we got called to an assisted living home. The medical emergency? The woman had a leak in her bathroom and wanted it fixed. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
redbluegreen 41
Oh wow. I just threw up in my mouth a little.
jio_freed 0
You must have magic fingers
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (234)
poiuytrewqlkjhgf 0
EW EW EW HAAAHAHAAAAA! #104 pretty much said everything, LAWL.
phiaphia 0
O.A.Peado
albo88 0
Was she a squirter or a dribbler?? Depends.
lauren_emm 0
Giggity giggity goo.
LuvPink 0
ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. ugh def fyl.
rightsaidred 3
I could have lived without ever reading that. CANNOT UNREAD.
defsdgdh 4
Were you washing her or fingering her with a warm towel?
stop_whining 0
Did you whisper "you're a dirty dirty girl" in her ear while you were 'cleaning' her? I bet you did, you little devil. Giggity.
ilg4evr 0
ohhh man....that is just soooo creepy. great for her though lol
wordgirl 0
You just made me sick. I want to cry and punch you in the face at the same time. That is so sad that I can't even think about it any more. For a person to have that little human contact...and for you to put that image in my f-ing head. F MYYYYY Life.