Today, I'm the coach of a football team. To celebrate winning a game, they poured a cooler of blue Gatorade over my head. This would've been great, if not for the fact that I'm highly allergic to blue food dye. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went our school's football game against their rival team. Before the games started, I got my school's logo painted on my face. After nearly 5 hours of watching the game, I went home to wash the paint off my face, only to find the logo had been sunburned onto my face. FML
Today, I had to dress up as the school mascot for a big game. The costume was incredibly hot, and I ended up fainting on the field. When I came to, I was surrounded by worried kids and my head was in the lap of the opposing team's mascot, who was trying to give me CPR. FML
Today, at my son's soccer game, I tried to give him a bottle of Gatorade, but the top was damp with condensation and I couldn't get a grip. I wiped it dry and tried again, successfully this time. No big deal, except my wife was watching and screamed, "IT SHOULDN'T TAKE THAT LONG!" Everyone stopped and stared. FML
Today, my 3 year-old son projectile vomited on me. I was covered head to toe in blue Gatorade vomit. FML
Today, in the bus, my Gatorade bottle's badly screwed cap resulted in my Jello being ruined and yellow Gatorade poured all over myself, the seat, and the floor. It looks like I pissed myself, and I still have to go through a whole building where several of my colleagues live before making it home. FML
Today, while eating lunch, one of my friends told a joke that made everyone at the table laugh. Apparently, the guy standing behind me overheard and was laughing too. So much in fact that he spewed the red Gatorade he was drinking all over the back of my white shirt and hair. FML
Today, my baseball team had a game and one of our best players was injured sliding into first. I'm pretty fast so when the coach called my name I grabbed a helmet assuming it was finally my chance to get in the game. Turns out he just wanted me to get ice. The entire team couldn't stop laughing. FML
Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "Five more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML
Today, I made my school's soccer team. I told the coach that since I have diabetes, I might need to sit out occasionally. He promptly erased my name and said he didn't accept "slackers." FML
Today, my team was mistakenly scheduled against an over-60 team. I'd feel sorry for the old fogeys if they hadn't beaten us 3-0 and racked up seven yellow cards and a red on the way to doing so. FML
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Top comments
kingtz 6
Did people just stand there and watch you go into anaphylatic shock, thinking it was your celebration dance?
mrahhhhh 21
Are you gonna dye?
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Comments (143)
fatalkiss 0
I thought this would be one of those "Oh, noes! I ruined my brand new iPhone 4! whine whine bitch cry".
kingtz 6
Did people just stand there and watch you go into anaphylatic shock, thinking it was your celebration dance?
L3Paparazzo 7
at least u won the game :P
fatalkiss 0
Well, she's right, at least you won...also, you're at a public event with lots of people around. I'm sure you got the help you needed.
GiddyXD 0
it clearly said they won the game.
helloello 2
that's what I'm talkin bout!
schaflava 0
after posting this op died
jimboner69 6
why would you bring blue gatorade if your allergic
hooligyn123 18
Damn it, thanks... now I lost the game
Jonscarl 0
who is allergic to food coloring
OceanBreathesSal 5
to be more specific, who is allergic to blue food coloring.
RayneStorm93 0
My friend is. She scared the hell out of me because neither of us knew exactly what it was. She just swoll up:/
ericownz101 0
H TWO OOOOOHH!!
venom2421 10
are you stupid OP just said he's allergic
Angi95 3
My mom is. She allergic to blue food coloring and blue dye number two and red dye number three and cows. So it's possible.
Killuhk 8
Lol cows? Your mom is allergic to cows? That's rather....odd lol
AX7Evan 6
How is that odd? That's like saying that some one that is allergic to cats or dogs is odd.
klrindal 2
Lol your mom is allergic to cows. Sorry not to be a douche but that made me burst out laughing idk why.
zanathegirl 6
well, most people allergic to cats and dogs ARE usually allergic to all animals with fur... enzymes.
Bearsmomma 30
my mom is allergic to cows too
LolaD18 1
Who cares? You won the gaaammeeee :D
BREADEDELF 3
Nobody wins the game.
iheartbewbies 0
LOL 100% WIN ^^^
alaskasfml 0
kay well tell me what you're highly allergic to (if anything) and after you do something big, i'll dump it on you and be like "hey, at least that really good thing happened to you. you'll probably smile all the way to the hospital. :)"
Naggerass 1
55 - Shut the **** up.
TimeDisposalEngi 14
I concur.
LolaD18 1
I have no allergies or medical problems, your move.
zuzupetalsYO 11
double concur
stickyvikky285 9
^^^Watch what you say .. karma's a bitch
chickunkey 0
haha. I was raised in the projects, the projects...
chickunkey 0
that was supposed to be a reply to #2^
Tayman24 0
O_o I didnt know you could be allergic to that
Oohgaloof 0
*AAAHCHOOOO* Sorry, I'm allergic to retards.
alaskasfml 0
you can be allergic to anything. even people like 34 that make extremely old and overused bad jokes and feel so clever about themselves. :)
sweeetas 5
5, I know right, who the **** is allergic to food dye it's pretty strange really.
sweeetas 5
and is it specifically blue food dye? OP wishes it was lemon lime gatorade
3mikey1 9
I used to be allergic to red food dye as a kid... sucks when your fav candy flavor is cherry...
tabarnak_fml 7
How can you be allergic to Gatorade when their flavor is 100% real fruits!?! It's not made of food dye!
zniltiaC 19
68 - Yeah me too. Still am kinda having a phobia of eating anything that's coloured. OP, that really sucks.
Just4EverBeingMe 4
Same, like how is it specifically blue dye?
Kawboy 1
and how do you find out that you're allergic to blue food dye?? Seems like something weird to be allergic to and to know about
Randuhh_17 4
people can be allergic to alot of things...everything actually.. they do a test on you to find your allergies.. or, you eat it, and get an allergic reaction..
RainbowHeadache 2
He could've eaten a blue cake as a kid, tried blue Gatorade, blue koolaid, big blue drinks, maybe blue candies? There are endless ways to find out you're allergic to a food coloring. A lot of things have artificial coloring now-a-days.
whoisthisgirl 4
yeah haven't you ever seen the girl that was allergic to sun light? or the boy (I think he was a boy.. if it was a girl my mistake!) that was allergic to water? or the girl that couldn't cry because she it would burn her skin..? I feel so bad for them.. :(
alaskasfml 0
it's pretty easy to find out if you're allergic to something. especially if there's so much variety of it. apparently common sense is your kryptonite, my friend. >.>
daydreamer89 2
agreed.
AX7Evan 6
You can't be allergic to water. You would die because most of the human body is water.
zanathegirl 6
actually, most people who are allergic to water can survive on milk, or fruits, for their liquid intake.
enonymous 9
So red food coloring is ok? what about yellow? Electrolytes are good for you!
johnnybagodonuts 2
its what plants crave
alaskasfml 0
more importantly, is green okay? first rule of kindergarten art class; blue plus yellow equals green.
xZsweeneyZx 0
Football in the spring???
DontModMeDammit 10
That's what I was thinking..but maybe he is talking about "football" I mean soccer..
Garytt 0
soccer is winter
ragzy 7
Football seasons in Europe are just finishing up..
alaskasfml 0
in alaska soccer season is late spring and football is mid/late summer (practice starting in early/mid summer so very soon here, in about a week) one can only assume it varies based on your location.
guckylynn 19
Semi-pro football teams are currently playing all across the US.
geko911 22
if hes in canada gootball season is on right now ( soccer also but...)
Socks91 16
Maybe it's Australian Football? We're smack bang in the middle of the AFL season.
beastlyguy 0
I didn't know Canada played football well that's another reason I love Canada
lilmisslovely13 15
Haha 66 you said gootball. You little goofball :)
txgirl2013 14
well...that is unfortunate...PARTY THE PAIN AWAY!
kingtz 6
Tomorrow, he gets to be a patient at the hospital.