Today, at soccer, I repeatedly asked my coach for water as I was feeling light headed. His response every time was, "Five more minutes". Eventually, I got so dehydrated that I passed out. The first thing my coach said when I woke up was, "Why didn't you get some water?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, at soccer tryouts, the coach made us run the entire practice. I ran the whole two hours ahead of everyone. When the tryout ended, I vomited due to dehydration. I didn't make the team. The coach's reasoning: "Only the weak throw up". FML
Today, I was sick and had soccer trials on the same day. At the soccer trials, the coach called me over and told me I was doing really good and to keep it up. I said thanks and vomited on him. FML
Today, I was told to "stop being such a little pussy." Why? Because my body chose to pass out from the heat. I didn’t complain even once, but I drank plenty of water and still passed out. FML
Today, at my son's soccer game, I tried to give him a bottle of Gatorade, but the top was damp with condensation and I couldn't get a grip. I wiped it dry and tried again, successfully this time. No big deal, except my wife was watching and screamed, "IT SHOULDN'T TAKE THAT LONG!" Everyone stopped and stared. FML
Today, I was at work as a lifeguard. The temperature was absolutely stifling, but I tried to tough it out. A couple of hours into my shift, I passed out, fell off my stand, and crashed into the water. Or so the medics tell me. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, I blacked out at work, on my lunch break outside in the rain, and woke up on the ground wet a minute or two later to everyone freaking out, all because I chugged my drink too fast. FML
Today, I was playing basketball in the searing heat with my friends. I jokingly told my friend that I was gonna die if I stayed out there much longer. Two minutes later, I got the ball and made the shot that won. Too bad I didn't see it, since I collapsed right as I took the shot and blacked out. FML
Today, I was at the pool, casually flirting with one of the lifeguards. He said that he would gladly give me CPR, in the event that I needed it. I laughed and thanked him, stating that it was a sweet idea, even though I wouldn't be needing assistance. I then choked on my bottled water. FML
Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
KittyHawkMarch 29
I can't stand people like that. Next time just do whatever you gotta do so that you're alright even if he gives you heck of it.
FusionPlacebo 26
I was in band camp last year and the same thing happened. However, thanks to me we get 10 minute water breaks now. I guess that's good? :D
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (79)
KittyHawkMarch 29
I can't stand people like that. Next time just do whatever you gotta do so that you're alright even if he gives you heck of it.
brownapple 22
Never ask for someone's permission when it comes to your health! Hope you're okay.
thatoneevilfuy 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
You hate people that do their job? The coach was doing what he was hired to do and push the players a bit more so they get better and can withstand further each time, if he'd have known it was that bad he would have told him to go, plus if it was as bad as OP claims then he would have just gone to get water like any non retarded person would, so really it serves him right for not just going to get water, what would the coach have done, stopped him from drinking it? All he would have done was tell him off for not trying harder
Fairyjoshy 13
You have literally no idea the kinds of punishments coaches can inflict without repercussions, do you?
Estrangement 25
53, Do you know just how badly you contradicted yourself? Dumbass..
wdin 10
honestly if you are feeling light headed just get some water, if your coach isn't smart enough to let you if you're light headed quit the team
FusionPlacebo 26
I was in band camp last year and the same thing happened. However, thanks to me we get 10 minute water breaks now. I guess that's good? :D
danial1214 21
Who needs 10 minutes for water ?
Alexis0927 22
Usually at band camp you get one water break every few hours. I'm not sure how long other band camps are, but mine is 12 hours of non stop marching and playing. Plus, it's good to have a few extra minutes to sit and rest.
cynthianicole95 9
#34 People that have to march around carryi g heavy instruments all day.
thefmlman2011 37
"this one time, at band camp"
laden_swallow09 35
"And then– And then– And then they shot a bear."
SystemofaBlink41 27
That was the first thing that came to my mind.
gqlmno 23
Hahaha band camp... reminds me of American pie. "this one time at band camp I stuck my flute in my pussy" hahaha
samthompson 12
this makes me mad
okaydisarray 17
because this coach is stupid enough to risk the health of his players for "five more minutes" without water. dehydration is serious.
samthompson 12
retweet^
Jowisee 29
If you need a drink, get one. Dehydration can be serious and all it takes is a minute to have a drink. Your health comes first!
Miss33_fml 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI - don't blame the coach for your inability to think for yourself.
MrSassypants 34
I hope you misread the FML because if you think listening to a coach that you are supposed to listen to even if they're being stupid is considered not thinking for yourself, then you might be not be thinking at all.
AscPhx 9
It's not inability to think for themself, it's showing respect and abiding by the authority your coach has.
DogeDogeDoge 13
If it's a school coach you should bring it up to your principle(s), OP!
Dick_diamond 22
*Principal
Shuff52 21
Been there a few times, and to the hospital for it once. You won't like it when you go to throw a party after winning a game and end up being rushed to the hospital instead. Know you're own body and listen to it. No one else
rlak111 19
Your*
Shuff52 21
Good catch!
TallMist 32
To the people above me saying YDI: For all you know the coach is a hardass that'll kick OP off of the team. And what if soccer is something OP loves doing and this is the only way he can get to play? He wouldn't want to get kicked off of the team. Of course, this is indeed based on assumptions, but they're not impossibilities.
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
Coach is right. Water you thinking?!