Anonycock
Doha, Qatar
Today, I'm so sexually deprived, I got a boner from undressing a mannequin at work. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
imaginationdarling
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Phoenix, United States
Comforting
Today, I was at my retail job and we had to change the mannequin's outfit. I had to hold her while my manager grabbed the new outfit. I rested my head on her naked plastic chest, and it was the closest I've got to affection in years. FML
Anonymous
Perv'
Today, someone tried to rob my boss's store and I had a knife held to my neck. That’s not the FML. The FML is that, for some reason, it excited me and I got a boner. The thief told me I was all kinds of messed up and left without stealing anything. My god, I’m some kind of freak. FML
ohcrap
United States
Today, I was shopping for clothes. I thought this guy was a mannequin because he was standing perfectly still. I poked him and he screamed like a girl. FML
xsnqw
San Francisco, United States
Today, I was sitting at my desk in school, and I was really bored. I started playing with the strings on my pants, only to realize 5 minutes later it looked like I was fondling my dick. FML
Thanks dicks
Today, I got naked in front of a girl for the first time. Too bad it happened when my "friends" pulled down my swimsuit at a party. Everyone saw my penis. I got a boner. FML
Creepster
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Hey good lookin'
Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML
AlexK
United Kingdom
Today, I was browsing my computer to find naked pictures of my ex-girlfriend. I decided it'd be funny to photoshop a penis onto one of the pictures. I'm straight and the new picture turned me on more than before. FML
SoMuchForThatIdea
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
What could've been
Today, I got to spend the entire day shopping for lingerie with the man of my dreams. He bought everything I'd ever wanted and more! Too bad it was for another woman. FML
FML
United States
Today, I came to work ready to impress my boss. A couple of weeks ago I asked him for a promotion from stock to sales and I have been proving myself worthy. Turns out he hired a new girl for sales, with great, big, fake breasts. FML
aXel
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
Top comments
joeyl2008 29
You need hookers. lots of hookers
Tripartita 45
It doesn't matter what you do OP, they will NEVER love you the way you love them! Trust me… On an unrelated note, I'd advise you to look up the word "agalmatophilia".
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Comments (58)
gabe67 13
two words . BEAT. OFF.
Distantsoul 8
Job satisfaction
frumpledforskin 2
vb
AScooterman 12
Call the happy ending massage parlor
west546 13
Its aight OP just get yourself a pair of compressions
dracolich 27
Open up your favorite **** site and give yourself some care. You're the one responsible for your sexual health.
mercyelvira42 23
Just wait until closing time when the most beautiful mannequin will come to life and make all of your sexual desires come to fruition. You don't happen to work with a black flamboyant window decorator named Hollywood, do you?
Fustercluck 14
well I mean, whatever it takes to get your rocks off man
papabear88 6
was it a sexy one? hahaha
Cerebral_Origami 5
It's spelled "depraved". ;)
ZoroMiHawk 25
"deprived" and "depraved" mean different things. If you actually knew what depraved means, you'd know "I'm so sexually depraved" makes no sense.