Today, I let out the most vile, nose-melting dairy curdling fart of my life. The sound didn’t wake me up. But the nightmare I had from how rank smelling it was sure did. My own fart ruined my sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML
Alarm
Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML
Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML
Today, I had the most rancid fart. My dog woke up from his nap and bit me as punishment. FML
Cozy
Today, my husband fell asleep on my shoulder. He then ripped a nasty fart. I exhaled slowly but apparently loud enough that it woke up my husband who promptly screamed directly in my ear, before screaming a second time when he smelled the fart as well. The worst part is that also he scared my cat off my lap. FML
Dinnertime
Today, the smell of my own fart made me feel hungry. FML
Threat Neutralized
Today, I farted so loudly in my sleep that it woke myself, my husband, and our cat. The cat let me know he was startled by clawing and biting the perceived threat, my bum. FML
Today, I woke up at 7am next to the man I swore I'd never get intimate with again. After trying to get back to sleep despite my shame and disgust, he ripped the loudest fart ever. FML
Top comments
donb23 23
A clear case of who smelt it dealt it turned out and felt it.
ThrottleJockey 36
The Force is strong with this one.
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Comments (4)
donb23 23
A clear case of who smelt it dealt it turned out and felt it.
alycion 39
Now ask yourself, was whatever you ate with lactose in it worth it? If yes, just don’t eat it when someone else will be sleeping in your room.
Charlie Given 28
I laughed with tears so hard I almost shit myself when I feel out of my chair 🤣🤣🤣😂😬
ThrottleJockey 36
The Force is strong with this one.