Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I gave my 8-month-old a bath in the kitchen sink after dinner, like I always do. Today, she decided to poop in it. FML
Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML
Today, my toddler gave me what I thought was a ball of melted chocolate. I held it and sniffed it to be sure… It was a freaking ball of her poop. FML
Today, my 1-year-old son walked up to me with a disgusted look on his face. I could tell he had something in his mouth so I pulled it out. He'd been sucking on a piece of cat poop. FML
Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML
Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML
Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML
Today, my 3-year-old missed the toilet. In the time it took me to get paper towel to clean it up, my one-year-old decided it was the perfect puddle to play in. FML
Today, while I was babysitting, the toddler was feeding me banana slices from her tray while I was cutting up clay for her to mold. It was all fine until she shoved something hard and crunchy into my mouth. I immediately spat it out into my hand. It was a dead cricket she found on the floor. FML
Today, while assisting my 2 year-old with potty training, she stuck her hand in her own poop, and when I wasn't expecting it, put her fingers in my mouth. Ever wondered what a green blowout tastes like? I don't have to. FML
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Top comments
Someone648 10
Chocolate raisins?
Pleonasm 36
Grapes of Bath- By John Steinbeck.
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Comments (112)
Pleonasm 36
Yea, this way she can save money on buying more raisins.
simoncat 11
No one fully digests raisins. Or corn. They plump, then poop out.
nothing92x 13
This is raisin quite a laugh out of me.
LolPieRofl 11
Im sick and tired of these shit puns.
Pleonasm 36
No need to as-sultana this guy for drying to make a joke.
LolPieRofl 11
i was just making a pun :(
loserman67 36
Feed your toddler some corn and peas along with the raisins, you'll get a nice little salad in return.
perdix 31
If this freaked you out, you should probably not get a pet rabbit.
lilbit91011 6
Aww. Sorry mama but hilarious. They can work as a laxative too.
heliraptor 13
Well if I were OP, I'd rather have this than a constipated kid. Fishing little raisin turds out of the bathtub sucks, but not as much as the grief you'd be getting for the next couple days if he or she couldn't go at all. Just a thought.
Exitium_Verum 2
LOL rabbit baby?
ICastillo 25
Nobody likes raisins. Why would you feed your poor baby them? Your baby was just getting revenge for making her eat those disgusting things.
courtneyann211 10
I personally have always liked raisins
ICastillo 25
I like turtles.
gc327072 31
I like trains.
dangousity 21
#59 .........
Enslaved 38
I'm sure that toddlers can indeed digest raisins. Are you sure he didn't just shove them up his bum instead? They go through that anal retentive stage at that age. :P
poccocurantes 7
Yeah whole raisins imply that baby was not chewing them. The worse thing is I have the old Kellogs Raisin Bran commercial in my head. Two scoops of raisins...
insaneDONUTZ 15
oatmeal raisin cookies are my favorite