Today, I learned that my mother has been telling people that I need anger management. I'm not attending anger management, I'm attending therapy to aid in my recovery from abusive relationships. She doesn't understand the difference or why I find it upsetting. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom found out I’m in therapy and took it as an insult, like therapy was a criticism of her parenting. Um, maybe if she hadn’t spent my childhood telling me and everyone in our family that having me was an accident, that I’ve been a huge burden, and that she should have aborted me. FML
Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML
Today, I got a lecture from my mother about how bad my stress has been, how I have to treat myself better and do something with my life. She still doesn't realize that most of the cause of my stress has been from her berating me about how stressed out I am. FML
Today, my mom put me in an anger management class because I said "crap." FML
Today, my mother threw a fit because the psychologist she got me suggested I visit a psychiatrist. Apparently, it's my fault because I "choose" to be so "crazy". FML
Today, going to my psychiatrist's appointment for my PTSD and depression, my mother yelled about how useless I am and how I torture her existence with my "abnormalities." She told the doctor how much I've improved and become such a delight at home for her and our family. FML
Today, I had my first therapy session for the issues caused by trying to please my overbearing, paranoid, self-centred mother. The first thing she did after we started driving home? Ranting at me and demanding to know if I'd been "talking shit" about her to my therapist FML
Today, my mum's response to my psycho sister being angry and threatening my partner, was that I should make her angry at me since she needs someone to hate, and I'm the default, so I handle it better anyway. This was after I asked her to get my sister professional help, and she denied the need. FML
Today, my mom found out that I've been having counselling behind her back for the past 4 years. I broke down in tears explaining everything. Her response was, "So you go and bitch about me behind my back?!" And she wonders why I'm depressed. FML
Today, I had to sit and listen in mortification as my mother tearfully told our therapist how much sleep she loses over my being morbidly obese. She doesn't seem to care that I'm body positive and happy with the way I am. FML
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Top comments
RobinGoodfellow 47
Sorry, OP, that's really hurtful. Sit her down and talk to her about her ignorance.
foxwasalamb 24
the abusive ones. reading is hard buddy. i get that
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Comments (54)
FEARxTH3xWOLF 14
what kind of relationships?
foxwasalamb 24
the abusive ones. reading is hard buddy. i get that
ImTheAlpha 30
I think he/she might have been saying abusive family or partner?
nana_star 27
U mad?
bl865ood 17
please think why she would be mad.
RobinGoodfellow 47
Hang on, we can't assume OP is a she. It's statistically more likely but not a given.
BoaNikolaos 14
Lol
RobinGoodfellow 47
Sorry, OP, that's really hurtful. Sit her down and talk to her about her ignorance.
engineerosaurus 26
Seems the OP already tried that.
donnybrook 5
She certainly knows the difference. If OP has been in abusive relationships, it's because he didn't learn what a healthy relationship is from his parents, because they were assholes. His mom is still being an asshole by pretending not to know the difference, and telling everyone OP needs anger management.
Brandi_Faith 34
I'm wondering if there's a possibility the mom didn't remember the name properly and meant more that Op was learning how to manage/cope from someone that had anger issues. I hope this is the case and she doesn't just think op is the one with anger issues.
xwingtwo 15
It's just sad to think that your mother doesn't know you better than that. Or know the difference.
FluffyPandas156 13
sorry to hear OP. Try and convince her to know what you're actually joining.
hurley12 30
Assuming you're not the abuser, I'm sorry that she isn't more supportive or understanding.
IAmzephyr 22
hopefully one day she will understand OP
homesuckfucker 28
Congratulations! Many victims of abuse are too afraid to seek help, and I'm proud of you for being so strong and courageous, OP. I completely agree with the above comments- your mother sounds as if she's extremely ignorant around that topic, and she certainly needs to be more empathetic. Try having a civil discussion with her about your past and the real reason you're attending therapy. of she doesn't understand or, for some reason, refuses to believe you, she's just an idiot. It can't be helped. Either way, though, there's nothing wrong with anger management, so I doubt people see you in a different light now. You could always explain to them what you really have a therapist for, too.
foxwasalamb 24
it might be the OPs mothers generation too, depending on the type of abuse and the gender of OP. people can be set in their ways. we don't have enough information
nix1993 41
Her generation has nothing to do with it, neither does being 'set in her ways'. If her daughter is not in anger management, she shouldn't be telling people that she is. It's common sense. No matter what she thinks of the therapy she can't just go round lying about her daughter because it's 'easier for her to understand'. We have plenty of information, OP's mom is a clueless idiot.
nix1993 41
I'll also point out that the same still applies if OP is male.
foxwasalamb 24
that may be so. you could have a valid point. just putting in my two cents
homesuckfucker 28
Your two cents is grubby and rusted. Did you find it at the bottom of a well?
Brandi_Faith 34
29, there's a possibility that the mother just doesn't understand what op is really there for and that she isn't intentionally lying to people or making fun/little of Op's experience. She just may not actually know or understand what's going on. As oppose to just getting angry, I would try and sit down and explain to my mom what happened in my past relationships and why I now need therapy and what for. Now if op's mom still doesn't understand or refuses to believe op then she's either really dumb or just rude and set in her stupid ways and beliefs.
Brandi_Faith 34
20 isn't wrong either. There's a possibility, as stupid as it is, that theres a generation thing going on as well, maybe the mother still believes that husband is "head of the household" and that its ok for the husband to be in charge and "discipline" the wife if needed. There are many in the past that did think this way. It's not right but it doesn't mean 20 is wrong.
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
The people above have some good advice, but if that doesn't work.....tell people that some medication she uses is for curing crabs or herpes. Then act like you don't the understand the difference or why she'd be upset about you getting it wrong.
RobinGoodfellow 47
That's terrible advice. You might use that as an example in a discussion with her, but don't go slandering people the way they slander you. How will that help?
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Someone as clueless as the OP's mother probably won't understand an explanation. "Stop saying I'm in anger management and I'll stop telling people you have herpes!" is much more direct. I'm not saying that's a good starting point, but if explanations don't go anywhere sometimes you need to be more direct.
FutueMeamVitam 24
Surprise twist: Mom: "How'd you know I had herpes?!?"
Brandi_Faith 34
Love that^ made me giggle picturing the mom's confused/surprised stare.