Today, I learned that ice cubes do not cool down hot oil. Instead, it causes a massive explosion of hot grease to splatter all over my parents' kitchen. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I managed to spill piping hot oil all over my kitchen floor, thinking it was too hot to clean right then and there I left it for a few hours to cool. I forgot about it, and slipped over in it bashing my head into my cupboard handle. FML
Today, I found out you really can burn down a kitchen by boiling an egg. FML
Today, I learned that just because the actual part of the pan that does touch the stove isn't hot doesn't mean that the handle won't give you third degree burns, a broken nose from passing out from the pain, and an expensive trip to the emergency room. FML
Today, while I was at work, my wife discovered you cannot put out a grease fire with water. I came home to a frantic spouse, a fire department bill, and a newly destroyed kitchen. FML
Today, I was craving a cold Coke, so I grabbed one from the freezer where I had put it to chill quickly. As soon as I opened it, the can exploded all over me and the kitchen. I spent the next hour cleaning sticky residue off the floor, surrounding furniture, and even the ceiling. FML
Today, I was sitting on a stool by the stove while my dad was making stir-fry. The glass lid he had covering the skillet overheated and exploded. As huge shards of broken glass rained down on his only daughter's head, my dad's only concern was whether or not he would have to throw his food away. FML
Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML
Today, I found out that shutting off the heat in the rental property my parents owned was a bad idea. The water froze and the pipes burst, causing the whole kitchen ceiling to fall down. The water ruined the wood floors and the appliances. I turned off the heat to save money. FML
Today, my dad used the stove to boil water. Unfortunately, he turned the wrong burner on, setting the smoke alarm off. What's worse was the smell of burning plastic that came from the coffeemaker being melted down. It's been over an hour, and my eyes still burn like hell when I walk into the kitchen. FML
Today, while moving my wax burner away from the window, I spilled hot wax all over my hands, the wall, and in my electric fireplace. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
telle_16 0
WTF, are you an idiot?
TeeHooligan 0
ooo burnn!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (362)
Zebidee 9
To all the people saying "oil and water don't mix", while that's true, it's not the concept that's at work here. The problem is that the water boils practically instantly and the expanding gas causes the oil to splatter, not the fact that a small molecule polar substance and large molecule non-polar substance won't interact. If it helps, think of what happened as being physics rather than chemistry.
Cinn_fml 23
I think when people are saying 'oil and water don't mix' they aren't using it as a synonym for immiscible, they just mean it in a 'dont mix them, it'll end badly' kind of way.
Zebidee 9
#315/Cinn - I think you're probably right there, but I think they're using it that way for the wrong reason. I suspect a lot of the people heard that expression which is normally used as an analogy, and then re-applied it to this situation where it doesn't actually fit. I'm impressed that you're giving the average commentator on here the benefit of the doubt though! Hmm - I remember checking your profile once before because you said something that was insightful. Good to see smart people on here every once in a while.
Cinn_fml 23
Tbf the only reason I said anything is because I would use the phrase you mentioned. But I'd be using it in the way I stated. I also like to think that the average person isn't as stupid as the trolls make it seem. Also, I remember you making a comment about/in Icelandic, though I could be mistaking you for someone else. If it was you I agreed with that comment, which just goes to play in that intelligence is appreciated around here.
Zebidee 9
Ah yes. If I remember rightly, the Icelandic comment was because people were being Grammar Nazis to an Icelandic OP. You have a very good memory, and I owe credit to google translate! There are definitely some smart people on here, and I guess there are a lot of people who just don't comment. For around 7000 votes per FML, there are only a few "hurr, bewbs, sammich" posters.
Cinn_fml 23
Yeah, my memory is freakishly good sometimes. And it was for that reason. (And shush, don't tell people you had to look it up :P) And yeah, you're right. But if you look hard enough you can find them. They hide away from the trolls because it's dangerous territory.
butterflyhearts 0
Well duh. H2o makes hot oil SPLATTER everywhere whether solid or liquid. Turning DOWN the heat cools the oil down. =_= obviously
coolridge 0
"Now you know and knowing is half the battle!"
Jessicaa96145 0
Atleast the Go make me a sammich, or Shouldn't you be in the kitchen where you belong? jokes don't apply here. YDI OP
onnielief 4
How do you not know water and oil don't mix? Why do you think they call an oil spill a disaster? Other than that YDI for not having the patience to wait untill the oil cools off by itself!
knestleknox 2
your a complete fucktard for not knowing how to deal with a grease fire. jump into it, if it happens again.
mjolene 0
how does anyone not know that you can't put ice in oil?? ******* moron
TinyVixen 0
well why the **** did u put ice cubes in the hot water.
Tpp4 0
it also happens if you put frozen French fries in hot grease. my grandma did it and caught the cabinets on fire. but then again she also slammed her head in the car door and her heel in the refrigerator. don't ask
luckylucas26 9
your an idiot