Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on AIM, I noticed one of his friend's away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said, "I can't believe what I stick my dick In sometimes." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML
Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML
Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML
Today, I fell for a guy after three years of being celibate, after he showed all the signs of being into me. It turns out that he likes my best friend, who is dating another guy I liked, and was just using me to compensate for her unavailability. I guess I am really a walking, talking example of Murphy's law. FML
Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML
Today, I found out the guy I’m in love with has been side-messaging one of my closest friends about hooking up for sex. This isn’t the first guy this has happened with. FML
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Top comments
Cheeley 17
So if I get a small car the women will be all over me?
annie_nk 23
There's a reason why stereotypes exist. And this guy proves that.
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Comments (85)
worldclassrager 41
Stereotypes are for the most part correct...well now you know the smaller the car the better...
middlenamefrank 8
Yeah, your life sucks, but not for the reason you think. It sucks because you place a high value on penis size. My prediction: you're going to wind up with a real prick.
sergei_yusef 11
Wellsaid
sergei_yusef 11
I meant well said
BrotherPhil 35
Well, as long as it's big enough for her.
pedinhuh 23
I always thought that you compesate the lack of length by having a lot of skill with it...
ladybuglet 22
But if he knows what he is doing, he doesn't need to be big. And besides, if he can't please you with his dick, he has fingers, hasn't he?
panda_lou 11
I've been with a guy that is the average which it 5.5 inches and he did a great job. I've also been with a guy that was 9 inches and I felt like screaming bloody murder so bigger isn't always better. So I'm not sure why girls are constantly complaining or comparing partners sizes. My friends always do this and I don't get it. Of course most of my friends also don't know what 9 inches actually looks like and it's more like 6.... Wannabe braggers. Anyways, my theory is as long as the guy has a personality that I like and can use his equipment correctly without complaining or basically begging for me to tell him he is big, because I've never been one to lie, then it's all okay with me. I'd rather have a small penis and a good man over a douche bag and a huge penis. That should be every girls thing unless she's a *****.
Omnytrx 3
If you truly like him, then you'll accept him as he is, regardless of his "flaws".
buddy_J 16
Size doesn't matter. If you think it does then you are a horrible person. Relationships are about people loving each other for who they are and not for the size of their body parts.
C0mmanderKeen 9
doesn't all americans drive huge cars? does that meen all americans have small penises?
Spider_Web 11
Yup, every male in America has a 2mm penis. You caught us
lucyskydiamonds 5
Wow. Size does not even remotely matter. I agree with #84...I've been with small guys that were great and bigger guys that didn't know what to do with it at all cuz they thought size made up for skill. Now if he doesn't know how to use it, then by all means, OP, feel disappointed. But, I agree with some others on here that are saying if you care about him it shouldn't matter how talented he is in bed. If you two truly like each other, the physical stuff will get better with practice. And that's half the fun. ;)
xRezSynn 15
So are you saying you don't like him anymore due to his size?