Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on AIM, I noticed one of his friend's away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said, "I can't believe what I stick my dick In sometimes." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML
Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML
Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML
Today, I fell for a guy after three years of being celibate, after he showed all the signs of being into me. It turns out that he likes my best friend, who is dating another guy I liked, and was just using me to compensate for her unavailability. I guess I am really a walking, talking example of Murphy's law. FML
Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML
Today, I found out the guy I’m in love with has been side-messaging one of my closest friends about hooking up for sex. This isn’t the first guy this has happened with. FML
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Top comments
Cheeley 17
So if I get a small car the women will be all over me?
annie_nk 23
There's a reason why stereotypes exist. And this guy proves that.
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Comments (85)
Frickenlovecats 4
I'm getting a big truck soon...
Freddie1015 5
Dont think that about ever guy with a big truck some guys just have bad luck in that area
HighasaCloud 46
How is this an FML? Your life sucks because you didn't get the ******* you wanted? Go get it somewhere else then. **** his life.
yourwifelovesme 25
I'm about to buy a smart car now lol
EvilLittleMan 23
If that's how it works then I am buying me a Smart Car !
Pot14 9
Not all us country boys gotta prove something with trucks.
thatgirlincali 13
It's so nice to know that the world has come to some people only having interest in someone because the size of their nether regions. And you suddenly don't like him because he's small? OP you sound shallow.
BrotherPhil 35
There once was a man of Cornpaw Whose dick was one inch and no more. It was ok for keyholes And little girls peeholes But it was lost in a bloody great *****.
Yveek 4
So he might not have a big penis. All guys still have tongues!!!
Bumblebee33 6
It doesn't matter about the size of the boat... but about the motion of the ocean;D