Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large pickup truck meant that he was "compensating" for having a small penis. They were right. Very right. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, I finally hooked up with the boy of my dreams at a party. Later, while on AIM, I noticed one of his friend's away messages was a quote from the guy's screen name, which said, "I can't believe what I stick my dick In sometimes." FML
Today, the guy that I've recently became close to texted me, wanting to hook up. He's very cute and I was definitely interested, so I agreed. The drive to his house lasted longer than the actual sex. He lives less than five minutes away. FML
Today, I hooked up with a guy. He didn't last 30 seconds before finishing, Then his car wouldn't start. I ended up walking home after a hook up that wasn't worth it. FML
Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML
Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML
Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML
Today, I fell for a guy after three years of being celibate, after he showed all the signs of being into me. It turns out that he likes my best friend, who is dating another guy I liked, and was just using me to compensate for her unavailability. I guess I am really a walking, talking example of Murphy's law. FML
Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML
Today, I found out the guy I’m in love with has been side-messaging one of my closest friends about hooking up for sex. This isn’t the first guy this has happened with. FML
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Top comments
Cheeley 17
So if I get a small car the women will be all over me?
annie_nk 23
There's a reason why stereotypes exist. And this guy proves that.
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Comments (85)
perdix 31
I commute to work in Heelys. ;) weenk!
NoFlippinWai 24
So Perdix. How you doin?
perdix 31
#38, ok, I guess, a bit tired from my 20-mile skate-commute where I kept tipping over due to my enormous junk :)
Habu987 9
...or maybe he has a job that requires a truck? Like construction or something?
HumanWiki 8
As a Corvette owner, I can tell you it's not always true. I'm not huge, but I have made plenty of women happy.
graceinsheepwear 34
A double uncalled for brag. Impressive.(Yawn)
EpicSquishii 21
As a 1990 Honda Accord owner, I can tell you that no one here gives a flying fornication about your car or your dingydong.
akiahara 14
Only believable if said women come forward.
Enslaved 38
Couldn't you tell by his hands? And speaking of which, how were his hands? There's more than one way to skin a cat. :P
graceinsheepwear 34
Hands that skin cats aren't getting near my pussy.
KayleighS14 8
That's the only thing people drive round here and it shows lol.
HumanWiki 8
Suck it, 44. It was fully on point based on the topic. We are talking about the incorrect assumption of nice/big vehicle = compensation for genital shortcomings. So, yeah, not a double uncalled for brag.
EpicSquishii 21
Maybe it's compensation for your crappy attitude and need to prove yourself to complete strangers?? Ponder that.
LegolasPrincess 10
If you like him as much as you say, his size shouldn't bother you. That whole "Oh size doesn't matter" is a bunch of crap. I personally don't care what size it is along as he knows how to use it, and uses it well. But for some women it's apparently the end of the world if the guy isn't sporting a 12" dick.
EmsyyyRose13 24
I would think that a 12 inch dick would hurt, and not actually be pleasant at all.
mkcherry 14
I dont think she was expecting him to break any world records for size but if he was small to the point of being a medical anomaly i think she has a right to be dissapointed. Besides she didnt say she was never going to see him again. I think most people enjoy having sex in their relaitonships you shouldnt have to stay with someone out of nicety if you simply dont enjoy being with them.
sweetbliss3 37
not all about size. as long as you both find a position that works for the both of you no biggie.
sammyjanette 17
No biggie, indeed.
sweetbliss3 37
Bahaha. I didn't even mean it like that until you implied it. glad you caught it bc I sure didn't. lol
skyeyez9 25
Not all big vehicles are for small penised men. I live in south dakota and alot of the men here drive large trucks because they live and work on a ranch. The vehicle pulls the cattle cars and other equipment ie they use a truck for its actual purpose. Pulling and hauling shit
CantTouch 9
With some types of people you're always taking a chance. However, once you go black, you'll never go back.