Today, I have a stomach bug. I went to go downstairs, and my cat decided to dart between my legs, causing me to trip and fall down the stairs in a pinwheel of vomit. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was going to be sick, so I ran to the bathroom. When I got there, I fainted, and fell back against the wall. When I came around, I immediately vomited all down my body, in my hair, and all over the floor. My cat judged me. FML
Today, my cat threw up on the floor while I was taking a nap. I woke up, still groggy from the nap, and walked over to the bathroom. Not only did I slip on the vomit, spreading it all over the floor and myself, I think I somehow broke a toe in the process. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML
Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML
Today, while I was vacuuming, my cat got scared and tripped me. I landed on the vacuum handle between my legs. Not walking too well right now. FML
Today, I was walking down the hallway when I stepped in an ice cold pile of cat vomit. I was barefoot. FML
Today, because I have an inner ear problem which gives me major vertigo and nausea, I spontaneously projectile vomited all over my bathroom. FML
Today, I had a terrible stomach bug. I quickly jumped off the toilet and crouched over the bowl. I vomited with such force that I splashed the shitty water back into my face. FML
Today, I got into bed as my cat crept under it. I then heard him gagging, so I instantly got back up to get him out, because my floor is carpeted. As I pulled him into the hall, he flew upwards, made a horrific "Blagh!" sound, projectile vomited everywhere, then hit the wall and ran. FML
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Top comments
MysticPizza 15
"Pinwheel of Vomit" might make a good metal band name LOL
pjsr 33
That's an acrobatic act to begin the year with. Happy New Year OP!
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Comments (40)
pjsr 33
That's an acrobatic act to begin the year with. Happy New Year OP!
Liamj774 36
Sorry about cat. It must have bugged you a lot. I bet your cat hope spew get better. No? Anyone? I'll leave.
whysobeachy 37
Took me a second to get "hope spew get better". I almost corrected you, thinking it was a typo.
Ilovemysphynx 19
Damn cats are always out for us, scheming and planning world domination.
Lalala579121 28
That's the penguins that want world domination. Cats are content with house domination.
walid820014 20
So much win #19
becca1998 22
Gotta love cats right? Haha
ssnow_fml 20
No, no I don't. I hate cats, dogs on the other hand....
flannelboss27 17
I do have to agree with you, I was and always will be a dog person, but, earlirr in 2015, I recently got my cats...man, they grow on you, still annoying, but they still grow on you
MysticPizza 15
"Pinwheel of Vomit" might make a good metal band name LOL
Tripartita 45
Or a horrifying Tumblr account.
divinorum11 11
This was hilarious to envision, in slow motion naturally.
emeraldisle 30
That's pretty impressive OP. Good job.
corky1992 33
Damn cats. Hope you get better soon though!
FalloutScrolls 25
Did...did your vision go black&white with a big flash of "wasted" in red letters?
LPac5295 27
Hope you feel better both from the stomach bug and the injuries from falling down the stairs.