Today, I had to inform a patient that she has an STD. She reacted by kicking me in the nuts. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML
Today, my coworker, who has a tendency to overshare, decided to tell me she has chlamydia. I threw my hands in the air and said, "Stop. I don't wanna know." A customer heard this exchange and we were both written up. FML
Today, I found out I have an STD, courtesy of my girlfriend. Funnily enough, she was clean when we first started dating. FML
Today, I had sex with a friend. It was really good too! Until she kicked me in my right nut while changing positions. FML
Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML
Today, I found out the girl I gave my virginity to gave me gonorrhea. FML
Today, I started my first day of nursing clinicals. My first patient was none other than my ex-girlfriend, who I recently broke up with. She has an STI. She told me I needed to get checked. FML
Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML
Today, I was laying down with my girlfriend, when she asked me if I'd ever been kicked in the junk. I awkwardly said no, and she replied, "Well maybe that should change." while rubbing my shoulder lovingly. I'm scared. FML
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Top comments
thomcmoore 23
I think she kicked the wrong person.
woainishamu 21
Always gotta blame the bearer of bad news -_-
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Comments (123)
TheTrainKid 20
HIPPA... Are you aloud to say this on line?
kalbrek009 20
Sorry to hear about your family jewels being attacked, she....on the other hand will have it a bit worse for her negligence in using protection....hope you notified your supervisor & the police that she assaulted you.
TheBookWyrm 18
You should have worn protection
Omniprism 15
That intelligence is what got her the std to begin with. What an idiot. Hope you feel better soon.
cwaziemamma 16
So tell me, you weren't the one to give her the std, where you?
EpicGuy70 13
About now, You should get some of that STD on your shoe while you give her a good old fashioned **** punt.
Fmlreadermostly 20
Haha you could have called the cops on her and filed an assault charge.
Nish007 15
haha, gotta love this country!
brenton490 19
You are std aladeen...
Saraishi 25
... I don't even... Sorry you had to deal with her, OP.