Today, I had to give a speech on the importance of dental hygiene. I got really nervous, so I did what I've heard in movies. I pictured everyone naked, began staring at a hot blonde in the front, and got hard. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML
Today, I had to give a speech but I wasn't prepared. I decided to give it anyway. While giving the speech, I got so nervous I passed out. FML
Today, I gave a speech at a charity event in part to help with my shyness. Nobody told me I was standing on top of an air vent. It went on. My skirt flew up, revealing my underwear to 90 people. Nobody remembers the content of my speech. FML
Today, I got a boner at the dentist's. FML
Today, I went to the dentist for a routine cleaning. As the dentist was working on my teeth, he accidentally sprayed water all over my face. I couldn't stop laughing nervously, which made the dentist think I was choking. He ended up calling for backup and I had to explain that I was just laughing. FML
Today, I had to give presentation at work, for which I'd extensively prepared. However, as soon as I started speaking, I had a sudden panic attack and forgot everything I'd rehearsed. I stumbled through the presentation, feeling the embarrassment steadily grow in front of my colleagues. I almost passed out. FML
Today, I had to give a speech on abstinence to a bunch of teenage boys, and surprisingly they were paying attention. After they left, I went to the bathroom and saw I had missed a few buttons on my blouse. The boys had a close up view of my cleavage for three hours. FML
Today, I had to give a speech on stage at a local preschool about fire safety. I'm 32 years-old and passed out on stage because I felt extremely nervous and intimidated by a group of 4 year-olds. FML
Today, I gave a speech at my best friend’s wedding. I wanted to say, “You both look beautiful together.” Instead, nerves took over, and I blurted out, “You both look beautiful naked.” In front of 100 people. And a priest. FML
Today, I was at the dentist's, getting my teeth cleaned. He thought it would be funny to suddenly go on in detail about the fantastic sex he and his wife had the night before. I was unable to speak the entire time. The dentist is my grandpa. FML
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Top comments
warmfuzzy 0
is being a "hot blonde" all it takes for guys to get hard? really???
Bathory_fml 0
Because movies totally give the best advice. YDI.
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Comments (122)
memmer66 0
Does this shit really deserve to be on FML? Seriously.
ClumsyJason 3
Next time, picture the actions too and start jacking off.
plexico 4
So you had to discuss Dental Hygiene in Louisiana? Which side did you take: for or against?
jessicadawg 0
Lmfao. That's too funny. Good one.
GrapefruitZoe 0
First picture them in undies, and if problems (that is, your penis) arise, think about the movie Teeth.
ShatteredEmpathy 0
That was dumb. You made an ass of yourself. So I think that's called "dumbass" Try taking a class, or watch how they speak to people in movies, not picture everyone naked.
aurevior1 0
How is this at all his fault? BTW, you are supposed to picture them in their underwear, but you still might get hard.
ice_cold1 0
lol thats really funny. You are supposed to imagine them in their underwear but that probably wouldn't have made a big difference in this case, would it?
N3VVRmiNd 0
thats cool. But... Blondes? Really? Brunettes are better
xXMILKYCHUNKSXx 0
You didn't think picturing a hot blonde nude would get you hard? You seriously need to think more.
semmita 0
Maybe he didn't SEE the hot blonde before he pictured them all naked?