Today, I had to find a date for this banquet we did in my town every year. I paid my neighbor 40 bucks an hour to be my date. It was a 4 hour event. Best part: she got drunk and told the whole town I was paying her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went on a date. I took her out to an expensive steak house. When she was done eating, she got up, said she was married, and told me she only accepted the date because I'd be paying for it. FML
Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML
Today, a coworker invited me out for a date, totally out of the blue. I had no idea she liked me, but I did my best to impress. She ordered the most expensive steak on the menu, two bottles of wine, and eventually picked up and went home with our waiter. I got the bill. FML
Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML
Today, my date unexpectedly brought her friend to dinner with us. They seemed bored of me after ten minutes and left me out of their conversation for the rest of the night. Oh, and they made me pay for both of them. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend pays my boyfriend to this day to take me out. FML
Today, I met up on a blind date. He took a phone call one drink in and said he had to leave because he didn't know it was his buddy's birthday, and they were having a party without him. I offered to split the bill and put out a $20. He got up, unlocked the bicycle behind us and rode off. FML
Today, I went on a date that went well, until the bill came and she quickly shoved it in my direction, then went to the loo. Rude, but I thought nothing of it… until our waiter took pity and told me I’m the fourth guy she’s had this week who'd been made to pay for her. I paid half, then went home. FML
Today, my "best friend" invited me to drink with her and a couple other friends. She told me to "just bring a few bucks for beer". When I got there, no one else had brought money, including her. They only invited me because I'm the only one with a job. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl. We drove separately and met at the restaurant. Over the course of two hours she drank a gallon and a half of beer, then her boyfriend picked her up because she was too drunk to drive home. FML
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Top comments
regalarius 0
Wow, that sucks. Why did you need a date that badly?
doodlebug93 0
wow. desperate much? i would rather go alone than pay that much money for a lousy date.
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Comments (131)
americancptv 0
Holy shit that's a lot of money to go to a banquet with someone are you really that desperate??? I mean really 160 bucks? Yeah don't pay her
hk_fml 9
good lord, 40 dollars an hour for a date D: Seriously? And then she ****** it up? I wouldnt pay it up.
24788 7
You probably should of found someone more trustable.
philosopher 0
Ah, the miraculous effects of alcohol... I think she might be the type to tell anyway even if she wasn't drunk. Plus, $40 isn't nearly enough to keep someone quiet. I hope you didn't pay her beforehand. YDI regardless. I'd feel better just going stag rather than having to pay someone.
illeyad 0
That was pathetic you restorted to paying a fake date to go to a party to impress people with. Wait tell next years banquet :P
deegee12 0
you had to pay someone $40 an hour??? you must be really ugly
Micahs_life 0
YDI for not being able to get a real girlfriend, or taking a friend. And she deserves it for whoring herself out to you... in a non-sexual way. (Or is it?)
adelaide_evening 0
You could have left out the last two sentences and it still would have been pathetic enough to be called an FML.
rallets 23
i think one question that needs to be answered is this... DID YOU GET SOME?
monicamischief 0
YDI you must be really ugly or have a really shitty personality if you have to pay someone to be your date.