Today, I had to clean my walls with those Mr Clean Magic Sponges because we were having visitors. I got bored and started drawing penises with it because they would leave wet marks. There is nothing magic about how slow they dry when your visitors come an hour early. They saw all ten of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my kids decided to draw on the walls with permanent marker, and now my house looks like a modern art exhibit. FML
Today, I found out that a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser will erase the paint right off your wall. FML
Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML
Today, while setting up for a party I was having, I put black lights into our bathroom for the cool bright, neon color you get when you pee. When I turn them on to see where I need to continue cleaning, I see many, small, yellow hand prints on the walls. I have a nine year old brother. FML
Today, on the first day of my nanny job, I wanted to impress my employers with how trustworthy and responsible I am. During the sixty seconds that I went to pee, the two-year-old found a black Sharpie and scribbled all over the wall. Nail polish remover made it ten times worse. FML
Today, I had to clean up after the kid who discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML
Today, while I was painting, my little nephew came in and started watching me. I left to clean my brushes. When I came back into the room, my nephew had spilled paint all over the carpet making a rainbow. It took me 5 hours to clean it up. FML
Today, my last task for the day as a high school janitor was to power-wash the concrete area where the graduation ceremony will take place. Tired and bored, I drew a huge penis with the power hose. Right before I was going to wash it off, the machine broke. Graduation is tomorrow. FML
Today, I hosted an open house. I forgot about it and arrived as they were leaving. There were dirty dishes and laundry everywhere, and my dildo was on my dresser. FML
Today, I had nothing better to do than make a penis out of silly putty. FML
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Top comments
drano 0
couldn't you just make more wet marks over them after you finished drawing your penises?
Crimson_regret 0
smoooth move. phalic drawings never end well, I've learned that from this website.
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Comments (126)
sickinlove13 0
Dude, how old are you?
alwaysalady 0
Why are guys always drawing penises? I hear about it so much. Is it some kind of affirmation? You never hear of girls drawing gentalia on things. Just a thought.
greenltrn2003 0
I think men take notice to the human body more its either that or penises seem like a logical thing to draw when youre bored. 8===D no wait... 8===============D there we go ;-)
mcsnelly 5
I think #99's reply just confirms what #95 said..."some kind of affirmation" Maybe these people drawing penises think it makes them seem like they're big if they're constantly drawing them? Or maybe they're just jealous because they're not not big and wish they could look like their drawings...idk but I think most guys are a little too obsessed with it...
ajf_17 0
ahahhahahahahhahahahahhahahahhahahhahahahhahahahhahahah i would so do this .
tranekfny 0
hahahhahahahaahhahaha. what did they say?
rachel_eryn 0
What is up with all these drawing stupid junior high pics and getting caught - sounds so fake and dumb - losers that make up sad stupid stories to post - not FML it is just no life
gorbagil 0
Ur an idiot, just erase all around to make the penises dull asshole
TenaciousD_fml 0
Exactly what I said! It's not rocket science!
wolfaust 0
You should have made them into top hats
somaturee 0
.... Couldn't you have just wiped the Magic Eraser over them, so it covered the entire area? YDI for not thinking. ;)
AshleyRose784 0
there is nothing about that story that makes sense...
YungMarlon23 0
AHAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!! ALL 10??!!!?! AHAHAHAHAHAHA FAAAIL!!