Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. When he slid his penis in, he felt my NuvaRing, and with the most excitement I've ever seen a man muster, said, "Oh my god! You have your clit pierced! I can't believe I actually get to have sex with a girl who has her clit pierced!" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Does it taste good?
Today, while my boyfriend was fingering me, he accidentally pulled out my NuvaRing, he then licked it off and placed it back inside me. FML
What's wrong with me?
Today, I had sex with my new boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he said, "I know women who would be really self-conscious about nipples like that. I love that you accept yourself." I had no clue there was anything odd about my nipples. FML
Found it
Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML
Turn off
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
Intricate design
Today, my boyfriend proposed. He gave me a really unique ring that I absolutely loved… at first. When I showed it off to my friends, one of them laughed so hard that she started crying, and said it looks just like a vagina. She's right, and now I can't unsee it. FML
Today, I lost my virginity to my boyfriend. As he came, he yelled "FIRST, BITCHES!" FML
Today, I finally had sex with my boyfriend. I had never gotten so far with a guy, so I was really nervous. He was careful, we tried different positions, "it was fun" and he came. I barely felt anything. FML
Today, I shaved my vagina for the first time ever. Had sex with my husband and then asked if he liked that. He said, "You've done that before, though". I haven't. We've been married 15 years. FML
Newbie
Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML
Bad start
Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML
Top comments
WCARlover 35
I think the real FML is that you guys apparently didn't do any foreplay
carleybeak 21
I think it might be time for him to learn some female anatomy...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (93)
carleybeak 21
I think it might be time for him to learn some female anatomy...
tibtak_fml 10
Looks like she was willing to help him with that but "I actually get to have sex with a girl who..." doesn't look like something to say to your girlfriend. I would say that he has few things to learn indeed...
sweetmidget31 7
lol
WCARlover 35
I think the real FML is that you guys apparently didn't do any foreplay
Nyattack 14
If he actually thinks the clit is inside the ******, they might have, but it was probably not extraordinary...
apieceofwork 2
The nuvaring is worn against the cervix, that is, all the way down the ****** at the internal end. OPs boyfriend mistakenly and idiotically thought that the ******** is there. There are internal parts to the ********, but not there. Term usually refers to the "button" found at the top of the vulva and may have been touched during foreplay but it is not mentioned him the post. And while clitoral piercings are a thing, there are no piercings of internal structures. A piercing at the far end of the ****** would be like getting your epiglottis pierced. And excruciatingly painful. I imagine OP did end up giving this fella an in depth anatomy lesson so he doesn't ruin the mood again!
bass_ftp 12
I think you'll find that as you grow older maybe not all foreplay involves putting your fingers inside there.
lela2352 1
I want to clear something up because a lot of people get this wrong. While people do get their clits pierced (usually accidentally, by an inexperienced piercer/friend who isn't licensed) it is, quite obviously, extremely painful and not recommended. What people are usually confusing it for is a clitoral hood piercing.
lvysmch 2
not even foreplay for that specific first time they had sex... but nothing the entire time -before- actually having sex?? my mind is blown.
nreed32 20
He could have just stopped at "I can't believe I actually get to have sex with a girl!" Because clearly, he never has before.
xMaeLA 24
Can we create a 'Find The Clit' challenge and make THAT go viral? Poor gal. Sorry, OP.
Lalala579121 28
And anyone who can't has to donate money to breast cancer stuff? (perfect month for it too) Based on the things I've read on FML there would be quite a few people donating.
eragon_1490 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
??
snake11292006 14
He apparently doesn't know female anatomy at all.
mrBearBear 11
A woman's clit is not inside her ******
Moerighan 23
It's sad how many men don't know what or where the ******** is. You guys need a chat I think lol.
tmj25789 23
Exactly. I really can't believe he thinks the clit is inside. He obviously doesn't know the anatomy of a woman.
psychopolarbear 28
What's even more sad is when they find it and suddenly think that the harder they press, the better it works
anythingmofo 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
What about those of us who never had sex ed in school and never watch ****? I'm very unfamiliar with female anatomy, never had a reason to learn it since I don't intend to become a doctor.
viipeterson98 14
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Then you must also be gay if you dont intend to have sex with a girl and know their anatomy
brenton490 19
Or maybe he just not interested or hasn't found a reason too. Don't have to gay to not want to have sex with every women.
DanielleinDC 34
Well, if you plan to have sex with women, #30 it would behoove you to learn about their anatomy. There are plenty of ways to learn about women's bodies besides ****.
lizenhagen 11
He never said he didn't intend to have sex. he said he's never had sex ed and doesnt intend to be a doctor. hence why he is not YET familiar with the female anatomy.
Nysha 17
You're on the internet! It's full of sex ed. Try Scarleteen for a start.
anythingmofo 6
I tried looking at wikipedia but all the pictures reminded me of the sarlaac from Star Wars. Is there a better way to learn this stuff?
chosha_fml 27
I also find it strange he thinks a woman would get a piercing deep inside her ******.
smc3106 25
“Behoove”. You must be Military, or very close to someone that is. Lol
RichardPencil 32
Just say yes! He gets the fun of ******* a girl with a pierced clit and you don't have to endure the pain. Win-win!
Notesz_b 13
W...What pain?
tomatosz 23
Of gettin her clit pierced, I think
Aurora94 20
On behalf of the male population I offer the sincerest apologies. Learn how to please your partner(s) folks.
GeeThatSucks 9
Don't apologize for idiots.
stryder9090 28
Ehh not quite.
mermaidkeels 26
Did you correct him on the spot, after sex, or just let it go? This post needs a follow-up!
dogpatch_fml 4
she should have let it go.... he'll figure it out when he goes and talks to his buddies about it
mariri9206 32
33: No, he likely won't figure it out when he talks to his buddies about it - he's not gonna give them, like, pictures or anything and they're not gonna be like "Uh, dude, actually. . . " The way they'd be able to correct him is if they sleep with her, too, or already have.