Today, I had my girlfriend over at my parents' for dinner. When we were done, my dad went around to collect all the dirty plates and stacked them on his arm. When he got to my girlfriend, the weight became too much and he and the plates fell on top of her. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to my fiancé's house to have dinner with his family for the first time. Trying to be polite at the end of the meal I went to take the plates in to the kitchen. I overestimated how heavy the half-finished soup pot was, and threw soup all over myself and future mother-in-law. FML
Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house having dinner with her and her parents. I was casually playing footsie with my girlfriend under the table, until her mom stopped eating and said, "You know that's my foot, right?" FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Dinner was going well until her dad secretly fed the asparagus to the dog under the table, and then "discovered" what a childish thing I had done. My girlfriend believed him. FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend, saying I had a lot on my plate. She responded by throwing an empty plate at my windshield. FML
Today, my girlfriend accidentally put rubbish in the neighbour's bin. Then the old lady took all the rubbish out and threw it on the floor. I came out and tried to calm the situation, but then my girlfriend ran downstairs and tipped her cat food and cat milk bowls over. FML
Today, I was at my girlfriend's house, and she was tickling me. It got a bit rough, and she fell out of bed and hit the floor. Her parents, thinking we'd been fighting, burst into the room to see her holding her bloody nose. She didn't say anything while her dad kicked my ass. FML
Today, for the very first time, I invited my girlfriend's parents for dinner. I bought a pre-made oven dish, just to be sure nothing could go wrong. Once at the table, her mother asked pointedly who forgot to remove the plastic foil before putting it in the oven. FML
Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML
Today, during dinner, my new girlfriend's father stroked my leg several times under the table with his bare foot. FML
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Top comments
Redoxx_fml 22
Welcome to the family!
kelseyyup 5
Sounds like the odds were stacked against her.
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Comments (171)
DocBastard 40
Most parents would just ask her to leave if they don't like her. Your father took it to the next level. Actually he took it up 5 or 6 levels.
curleyQ97 9
its whatever.
princess151617 4
What did she do ? If I was her I would have sucked in all the air and probably screamed.
biggie95_fml 4
He used to be strong enough to hold all the plates but than he took an arrow to the knee
DocBastard 40
Some FML arithmetic: Bad grammar + overused joke = no.
DenisTheMenace 13
Careful, she's got a chance to create a new alliance against you with your parents. Baby pics, secrets, the whole nine yards.
RoseCrystal 17
suuuurrree he did. I'm sure it was an accident.
brandon3747 16
that's terrible
HaykamNation 8
YOUR life doesn't suck... HERS does. Sorry OP
hellaflushfa5 6
Oh look what happened by accident (gay family guy voice)
MickGold 8
Let's hope her pretty face went unharmed. What happened after that, though, is what I'm wondering. Is she ok? Was your dad super sorry? That's a great way to say, "welcome to the family!"