Today, I had my first free night in months. I spent it doing homework and watching TV. I had set my Facebook status to say I was spending time with the boys from The Big Bang Theory, then fell asleep. I woke up later to an angry text from my boyfriend thinking I was cheating on him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her Facebook status said, "Pointless day, gone to bed." FML
Today, I had the day off from work. I did all the chores hoping to free up time to spend with my husband tonight. When he came home, he looked around and decided that since there was no need for him to stick around and help clean, he'd head to the bar to watch the game with the guys. FML
Today, my wife finally let our kids stay the night at my mom's house, meaning we had our first night totally alone together in 6 years. She spent all night texting my mom for updates on the kids or on the phone to her sister, so I watched a film by myself then went to bed bored at 8:15 p.m. FML
Today, I saw that my ex-boyfriend was online and had no plans. I felt extreme happiness knowing he had no life. Then I realized that I was online and had no plans. FML
Today, I spent one night with my phone turned off so I could finally relax. When I turned it back on I had 17 missed calls from siblings wanting to moan about their spouses, 5 calls from mom, 6 from dad, 2 from work, and 2 from my ex. I think I’ve earned some time alone, don’t you? FML
Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML
Today, I was checking my friends' posts on Facebook and all of them were complaining what a boring night they had. They were all just at my house. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me on a romantic weekend away at a hotel. What is he doing now? On his computer looking up stuff on Craigslist while I am watching t.v. alone. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend wanted to spend time online with me. He kept quiet on Skype and went on a hundred different stupid websites, laughing by himself. Afterwards, he told me he really enjoyed our time together. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
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Top comments
hiyourcute 0
Well, Sheldon could drive any woman to cheat...
DocBastard 40
Imagine what his reaction would have been if you'd said you'd be spending the night with Two and a Half Men.
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Comments (106)
LaughAtLaugh 7
With a reaction like that, he may be having infidelity tendencies.
Bobissmall 13
I disagree #1... if she told him she was going to do homework and watch TV, and then she makes a status saying she is hanging around with some guys he doesn't even know... Then yes, I think he was fair to assume she was cheating. Edit: To clarify, I am assuming she didn't write "Spending time with the guys from Big Bang Theory" but that she wrote "Spending time with *lists names*" Still, if he didn't know what the Big Bang Theory was (he could have guessed it was a band or something?) then it's still a fair reaction?
Cad6 24
^I have a feeling this guy might have over-analyzed this, just a LITTLE bit.
Bobissmall 13
Haha, I just like to make my point clear so that people don't think I'm an idiot ;) Unless they do anyway of course.
OHai15 12
BAAAAZINGA!!
annienicole_11 0
It restores my faith in humanity to see that so many people watch the all time best show ever invented.
sensoon15 7
Explain to him. Not that hard.
22cute 17
Agreed! Sad he doesn't know...are you sure you're suited for one another?
mjoyn98 1
57- You're suggesting that since they don't share the same interest in television programs they're not right for each other?
KMFiredancer 0
57 - It's The Big Bang Theory. Of course that determines if they're right for eachother...
hiyourcute 0
Well, Sheldon could drive any woman to cheat...
Cad6 24
Not as much as Raj. Nobody can resist a brown dude with a kickass accent and a tendency to piss under stress.
blackheart24 10
Yeah but Raj can't even talk to women. What I don't get is why Penny likes Leonard. Sheldon is definitely my favorite. Penny *knock knock. Penny *knock knock. Penny
squirrel1215 5
Bazinga!
ladyLALAA 29
I like the penny-blossom episode where Penny gives Sheldon coffee, then he's running around in The Flash suit yelling "zoom, zoom."
iluvhobos 5
Good LORD how you frustrate me, Leonard Hofstadter!
emmaa3451 11
Don't engage in coitus with other people OP... -____-
22cute 17
Mmmm Leonard's the perfect man
billiebob123 2
39 Boobs ;)
Yourheadache 19
#63, forever alone
Yourheadache 19
#63, forever alone
VixSparda 5
XD ha. im surprised amy hasnt.
stargazur 9
Soft kitty warm kitty, little ball of fur, happy kitty sleepy kitty. Pur! Pur! Pur!
doglover100 29
Leonard is a cutie though.
MrBoredGuy 1
The "big bang" part confused him
linkinpark98 24
Looks like he isn't as bright as he seemed to be…
chimocho 8
Aw poor boyfriend xD at least her cares enough to be angry. He might not have read the status right, or you might have phrased it badly. Either that, or he's joking. Or he's stupid.
hiyourcute 0
I'm going to go with door #4
zachherbert 10
Can I buy a vowel?
_MidnightLuna_ 17
Your boyfriend is duuuuumb. Sorry OP.
perdix 31
He probably watches too much **** and thought you were referring the "The Gang Bang Theory." Innocent mistake.
maths_fml 2
lol they had a marathon run of the big bang theory today in my region..it's awesome.I love big bang theory..and Jim parsons and kunal nayyar and Simon and kayle and Howard..and chuck too.
StanSmith_fml 9
Stop.
dbt88 15
11- Simon IS Howard.
maths_fml 2
oh is it! my bad..I thought Simon is leanord..then who's leanord?
DocBastard 40
Imagine what his reaction would have been if you'd said you'd be spending the night with Two and a Half Men.
michael666 7
doc. your the best hahaha.
kkjkidonthate 4
^Suck up much?
ThatOneCanadian 0
^douche much?
Kefka91 15
^Canadian much?
Jakesterk96 8
^pointing much?
sonicgreg 12
^heated much?
Yourheadache 19
Much, much?
QuirkyCorgiLove 8
Lol.. MUCH!! (Because you know.. I laughed..:))
KMFiredancer 0
C-C-Combo Breaker!
maths_fml 2
drink beer much?