Today, my fiancé paid a visit to my parents so he could ask my dad's permission to marry me. My dad responded with, "Why buy the cow when you can milk it for free?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after 5 years of dating and not even so much as a hint of a ring on the horizon, I asked my boyfriend why he hasn’t proposed yet. His response was “Babe, I’m not gonna pay for the cow when I get the milk for free.” What does that even mean? FML
Today, I happily told my parents that my boyfriend proposed to me last night. My dad's response? "Marry that goofy bastard and you're out of the will." FML
Today, my dad had a chat with my fiancé, telling him he can do better than me, and to think carefully before going through with our wedding. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me to marry him. When I happily told my dad, he kept asking if I'd consider taking back my ex. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend's dad for permission to take her hand in marriage. He said no, because he doesn't want her marrying a "sexist idiot who treats her like property", which he thinks asking permission amounts to, then told me to grow up. FML
Today, I asked for permission to marry the girl I love. Her father not only said no, he said "HELL no!" FML
Today, my father was offered 85 sheep for my hand in marriage. We live in the USA, and he is literally contemplating the offer. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked my father for permission to marry me. My father refused, on the basis that I'm the only person in the house with a job, and if I leave he will have to start looking for work. My boyfriend won't marry me without his permission, and my lazy father won't change his mind. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend's father if I could marry his daughter. He smiled, shook my hand, and said "No. Now get out of my house." FML
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Top comments
ItsAnanya 25
Should've asked your mum ," why did you buy the pig if you could get the sausage for free?" Congratulations on the engagement though ^~^
perdix 31
#7, it was a barnyard reference. The dad was horsing around by being a pig. Hopefully, the OP ducked the question and won't chicken out on the proposal -- that'd be bull! See how that works? Now, you give it a try. . .
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Comments (73)
little_one 20
Your dad sounds like an "ass"
Queensland 27
I don't get it.
Ian7890 23
I think they were referring to a donkey... but that still has nothing to do with this.
hannaaaahr 33
I'm sorry to break it to you, but donkeys and cows are two different animals.
perdix 31
#7, it was a barnyard reference. The dad was horsing around by being a pig. Hopefully, the OP ducked the question and won't chicken out on the proposal -- that'd be bull! See how that works? Now, you give it a try. . .
Enslaved 38
Because the bull is horny!
Queensland 27
I got the donkey reference, but I didn't get the barnyard one #15. I am a silly goose. :)
queendeadjesters 2
It's just a joke lol.
phantumgrey 6
Dad has some sound advice
finnrambo 13
you have a disturbing picture 44
stanjohnson 11
Hopefully he was joking. Crude and off the mark if he was, but hopefully.
lopsop 12
No I'm pretty sure he actually wants his daughter to be a whoreable person.
archnarquibquib 21
#22- I don't always want milk, but when I do, I get it for free.
MsConfusedd 27
Well that's a nasty metaphor.
Damian95 16
That's cruel but playful fathers for you!
lennelleong 33
Wonder if that's what OP's granddaddy said to your dad long ago. Sorry OP!
olpally 33
Horrible joke and horrible thing to say. Parents are so cruel on here. Good luck op.
mrs_bruno_mars 14
They may be cruel, but they make such great stories.
ItsAnanya 25
Should've asked your mum ," why did you buy the pig if you could get the sausage for free?" Congratulations on the engagement though ^~^
omgthisisgay 10
I would see that as more of an attack on the dad. Kind of like when baby mommas tell their kids "daddy is a jerk."
4everbymyself 12
"because i would love to start a farm with her" Thats the most badass and corny response i can think of lol
ManInTheMachine 20
What an udderly heartless and insensitive thing to say! If your dad was calf the man that he should be, he would've either let him down cheesy or given him his blessing. I think you should have a long talk with your dad about this, but try not to (milk)shake things up too much.
p36288 17
kind of exam for him?
ApollosMyth 22
...How?
perdix 31
He's just trying to weasel out of the tradition of paying for the wedding. (Play your cards right and he'll buy you a new car if you promise to elope with "the cow.")
ManInTheMachine 20
*Pssst!* Perdix, OP IS the cow.
perdix 31
#13, OK, I meant the fiance ought to extract a sizable bribe from the father to get him out of the expense and the hassle of putting on a big wedding.
Enslaved 38
Your dad is just trying to be funny with a twist of an old joke. I think it goes-- Why buy the milk when you already have the cow at home.
BobbieH 19
The saying is "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?"