Today, I got reprimanded by my boss for saying "It's a stab in the dark, though." According to him, it's a euphemism for anal sex and I was being offensive to a gay colleague, the same one who kept insisting it was no problem. I got written up anyway. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss wrote me up for saying "pissed" in front of a client. This is the same boss who nearly pissed himself laughing when a client made an extremely off-color Holocaust joke a few weeks ago, in front of half the department. FML
Today, I was written up at work for "leering at my boss". I'm so sorry for having my eyes sore due to lack of sleep. FML
Today, my boss put me on suspension, a week after granting a subordinate time off to recover from surgery. When I signed the paperwork, I was too embarrassed to admit I didn't understand her writing, which apparently said she was getting treated for "dangerously low levels of dick". FML
Today, my boss reprimanded me for a huge screw-up that he was responsible for. FML
Today, after telling my boss that trailing a hand up someone's leg and leering at them constantly is counted as sexual harassment, I got called an "unappreciative little whiny bitch." FML
Today, I had to reprimand an employee for her bad attitude and terrible work performance. She went to HR and said I harassed her for being gay. Guess who they believed. FML
Today, I got reprimanded by my boss for smiling and laughing too much. Last week, he reprimanded me for not smiling and laughing enough. FML
Today, I was working when I delivered the standard "Hello, how are you?" to a customer. He took the opportunity to tell me about his deceased wife, his estranged children, and his anal tearing. After a while, I tried to help someone else, and he complained to my manager. I was written up. FML
Today, I unintentionally came out as bi to my boss. He said he's fine with it and doesn't care either way, only that there is too much "gay propaganda" in the world and it shouldn't be shown and talked about so much. He also doesn't understand why I was reluctant to talk about my sexuality before. FML
Today, I found out that absentmindedly correcting my boss's use of the word "whom" could result in my immediate termination. FML
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Top comments
____gerard____ 11
I don't see how that could've been offensive to gay people
HeadlessSparrow 20
Horrible Bosses 3: FML edition
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Comments (88)
Frenchtony 17
Is your boss Michael Scott ?
ohSNAPyall 27
When was Michael Scott ever concerned with being politically correct? See: Kelly's first episode.
wvcheesehead 13
Isn't the proper phrase "a shot in the dark?"
Cely988 29
I guess OP was trying to be more creative xD
RobinGoodfellow 47
Both are correct.
yorkie_16 15
your boss is a prick, big time!
syed121417 22
Where the hell would he get anal sex from "Stab in the dark"? You don't stab someone when doing anal and not only gay people have anal sex- does he not know that? I hate it when people try to find something offensive in everything. Your boss is crazy and looks like they were looking for an excuse to get you in trouble. FYL. Some people just don't like logic.
Mirorbo 27
Found the SJW
Andrew863 12
go to hr and get him written up.
sassy2085 16
Does your boss live under a rock. Every one knows that it is s common saying nothing to do with being gay.
captainsmegma 12
Cocksucker or rump ranger are offensive.
greatkate2020 14
What an idiot!
KyleLord_ 9
That is just stupid.