Lifeless
United States
Today, I got into a staring contest with my dog. I actually cheered when I won. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Australia
Cute couple
Today, myself and my pug entered a novelty dog competition at the local fair. We won first prize in the lookalike contest. FML
Username
United States
Today, I decided to play with my dog. I sat on the ground and whistled for him to come to me. I smiled when I saw him running at my happily. He sniffed me, turned around, lifted his leg and peed on me. FML
smellsofeggs
United Kingdom
Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML
CheeseMonsters
United Kingdom
Today, I went to get my friend a drink while she sat in the lounge watching TV with my dog. When I came back, I found her licking my dogs ears. She said he dared her to do it. FML
anonamous
United States
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
Kelsiiii
Cujo 2: Electric Boogaloo
Today, I pretended to be dead in front of my dog to see what he would do. He started to hump me, and when I tried to get up, he growled at me until I got back down on the ground to wait until he was finished. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff
Tucson, United States
Doggy dog world
Today, I was playing tug of war with my dog. She let go and I ended up punching myself in the mouth. My lip is still swollen. FML
aXel
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
anyonmus
Westminster, United States
Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML
chris
United States
Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML
Top comments
marinus_fml 20
It could have been worse, you could have lost and cried...
perdix 31
I'll bet you cheated and blew into his nose to make him blink.
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Comments (111)
marinus_fml 20
It could have been worse, you could have lost and cried...
daysgoby902 6
true
chuchurocket 4
I don't get why this is a FML... You fricking won.
khaya 9
...And then you lost to a stray cat. Don't feel bad, you lost to an animal that can lick their own balls.
iamfunny 0
now its my turn to take you on... but just so you know.. im an all time champion.
Crystalosophy 0
Now your dog knows who's boss!
mfjkr 10
I take my hat off for your dominance next time do it with a vicious dog see if you win then
WOGBRO 6
Very true
Overseer211 1
Try it with a raccoon during the day.
Overseer211 1
Try it with a raccoon during the day.
Overseer211 1
Try it with a raccoon during the day.
Overseer211 1
Try it with a raccoon during the day.
mimego 0
haha wow
qwert1994 0
I stare at my dog and never lose :). I must be some kind of pro?
Jayrs93 11
do u cheer when u win?
the_ace1337 0
To life, to life lecheim! (I think that's how you spell that) :D
perdix 31
I'll bet you cheated and blew into his nose to make him blink.
brini_20 1
HAHA!!! i've done that to my dog before :)
chameleon724 8
That in itself could be an FML.... "Today, I had to cheat in a staring contest just to beat my dog."
frolick123 0
this is NOT an fml... u WON
MizoneDrinker 0
My dog beats me at staring contests.
shovels 0
^ that makes sense, cuzzz it seems like my dog does anything to avoid eye contact!
jazziness 12
Never get into a staring contest with a cat it strips you of your dignity!
hnz 13
wow I don't know this contest exist..
example947 0
^..what does that even mean
hnz 13
I'm just shock that there is these kind of contest. I've never saw or heard of it before..
unluckiestperson_fml 14
It's...it's not like an official thing, she just decided to have a staring contest with her dog.
hnz 13
ok now I get it. I feel so stupid. thanks
qwert1994 0
5- Ya they host them all over the world. It's very entertaining to watch. Can't believe you never happen to even see one on t.v.
iamfunny 0
oh yeahh! i watch them all the time. they can go on for minutes at a time. very suspensful.
kyrintethron 0
I, for one, am impressed. no negative voting from me.
iAmScrubs 19
The next step for you young apprentice is Ye mighty lion.
techweed 12
That's just SAD!!!!
JustinThunder 8
At least you're dog isn't a sore loser.. I'm still recovering from my broken nose.
bfflrhea 0
lmaoo!
RinzlerTLS 2
in public?