Today, I got a gift-wrapped package in the mail from my racist mother-in-law. She's always hated me, so I thought it was a bit strange. Inside was a squirt gun and a note telling me to take my "black ass" for a walk around a police station with it, followed with a smiley face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Thanks but no thanks
Today, I received three big boxes from my mother in law, containing expensive cookware. I was puzzled, because I know that she hates me. Turns out she mailed them to us by mistake. Not only did she not get us anything, but I now have to pay to ship the boxes to her neighbor. FML
Today, I received the 'special' present my mother had sent me for my 21st birthday. I opened the box and saw that my mother had picked out, accessorized and shipped to me, in college, a doll. FML
Thanks, I think?
Today, I received a package at work. Thinking it was something I ordered, I opened it in front of my coworkers. It was a gift from my grandmother: a giant pink, “I Love My Grandson” T-shirt. The worst part? They insisted I put it on and take a picture to send to her. FML
Busted
Today, my hateful mother-in-law showed up unexpectedly. I faked taking a phone call so the bitter old hag would leave me alone. She then pulled out her phone, called my number, and glared at me as my phone rang against my ear. FML
Brown and sticky
Today, I came home a day after my birthday, and was greeted by my mother who told me, "Oh, I have birthday present for you." She explained that she and my father went on a hike, and handed me my present. I got a fucking stick for my birthday. FML
Today, my wife made me go with her to dinner with her parents, despite their long-standing hatred of me. Later on, my mother-in-law muttered to me, "I made yours special for ya", smirked, then made a show of scratching at her butt-crack. FML
Pushback
Today, my racist grandmother was complaining that the new nurse at her nursing home is a black woman. I casually asked, "Is she cute?" I'm now out of the will. FML
Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML
Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML
Break ups are tough
Today, my pissed off girlfriend used window marker to write racist comments on my car window. This included Nazi symbols, "white power", and a few others I won't mention. I live in a predominantly black neighborhood. FML
Top comments
Hiimhaileypotter 53
The ugliness of some people never ceases to amaze me.
dude_itskayley 17
The fact that it's holiday season, and somebody who is supposed to be your family, can come up with disrespectful "gifts" like this is just a mystery to me.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (179)
Hiimhaileypotter 53
The ugliness of some people never ceases to amaze me.
kipperin 18
Can't you report her?
Bragi 12
@40 - Report her for what? Hate is protected speech in the US.
incoherentrmblr 22
It's not like the gun was filled with liquid to make a bomb or acid...
Mrtigerblue 14
#46 yes it is protected which while not a great thing does stand for the protection of all free speech. I for one don't see this as a complete bad thing considering I don't want to see Amy restrictions by the government on what we are allowed to say or think. I believe that us as people should move past such hate but that on a legal level the government shouldn't interfere
Bragi 12
@67 - Freedom isn't free, it requires putting up with other free people. Everything in life is a trade-off.
Norja 33
I'm interested to know what your wife says about this.
Waschlappen 23
I live in Denmark and here we also have the freedom of speech, but we also have something called the rascisme paragraph, where you can get fined if you use your freedom to speak in a rascist manner. So you can be able to speak freely and while still having certain restrictions as to how much hate you'll allow. On a second note I'm not sure if it's a good idea to actually report you're mothe-in-law. Always tricky when it's family.
R2Y2 22
Send her an airsoft gun and a note saying "take this for a walk through WalMart"
blazingshot147 19
@117, that would never work in America. At the moment, only white people can be racist and only men can be sexist. (Yes, that's a hyperbole, but it has a huge ring of truth to it.)
chosha_fml 27
Including every person who hit YDI.
Everyday_Galaxy 14
She must really love you.
lnheritance 19
Just send it back and say, "Didn't you mean this for yourself?" With a winky face.
YepThatsMeee 23
Well, that wouldn't work. A black man walking outside the police station with a gun would get himself shot. A white woman in the same situation - not.
lfrider92 21
Was this supposed to be funny? I must have missed that part...
lexa1love 16
I imagine anyone walking around a police station with a gun is likely to get shot. Anyone with a gun threatening harm to me or mine is dead. Don't care if it's a man or a woman or if they are black, white, blue, purple or any other color.
garrett_8614 14
More likely for the black person to get shot though unfortunately. It's been proven time and time again. It's quite infuriating.
dragonclaw6 11
I'm assuming #3 meant that OP's mother in law should have the gun since there has been a lot of hate crimes recently. But as I said I am just guessing.
martin_dustinc 8
#62 do you have documented statistics to back that claim up? I feel like you're just repeating hearsay.
GummiieBear 12
There's plenty of statistics and the pure fact that at least 3 times a week I have to hear about a black teen or young adult being murdered by the police b/c they feared for their life when an unarmed teen was near them is enough for me. I've seen police brutality up close and personal, I've also seen how my white friends can be drunk, high, armed and driving and not even be detained but I can be sober and sleep but be harassed.
isisorchid 16
Last year a white homeless man was beaten to death here in Fullerton for resisting arrest. In videos you can hear him sobbing, begging for them to stop, saying he wanted his dad. It's not just black people that police victimize. But, look how many officers are killed in the line of duty versus how many citizens, innocent or criminal, are killed. The only difference between the two is that officers are rarely convicted of their crime when they do go corrupt.
icekitten14 12
#130, that's terrible! I agree, it isn't just black people. I think people in general are harassed by the police, simply because the police can do anything and say it was self defense. I'm not saying every policeman is a terrible person, as I am married to an officer, but there are some people out there that shouldn't have a badge.
AyOoDaLoBo33 10
Exactly!!! I live in a very small town and police have very wrongully harmed two light skinned people in my area. They shot and killed one man and they beat another and left him for dead. These police murders and beatings happen to everyone regardless!
smile5210 7
Yes, it happens to whites too, but significantly more to blacks. I don't remember the exact numbers, but if the 40 or so police shootings this year about 5 white, 5 Latino, 2 women, the rest black men.
Marie54321 19
Just send it back with a note saying "regift ;)"
bettyrulez 16
Some people are just so rude and hideous on the inside. Don't let it get to your head OP.
samantha236le 17
Racism is unacceptable.. but the actual definition is saying one race is superior to another race.. almost everyone forgot the real definition of racism. FYL
Nymeria_fml 25
I don't see OP giving an actual definition, so I don't know what you're on about. In any case, OP knows his mother-in-law better than you do, so criticizing his use of the word 'racist' is pointless.
ELoni_fml 25
So how is what happened to OP not racist?
lfrider92 21
"Have you tried, not being black?"
Chizzle1496 6
13, To be fair, the mother in law was not being racist in this instance. Hateful, yes, but not racist. Pretty much all she did was point out that a black man with anything that looks like a gun will get shot by the police. Granted the 'black ass' part was racist but not the other part.
RedPillSucks 33
shes implying OP should have used the word,"bigot" instead of "racist". today people use them interchangeably though they dont meqn the same thing
Nymeria_fml 25
This is not difficult to understand, though. OP is not saying that this one event mentioned in the FML makes his mother-in-law racist. OP is saying she is a racist, and we don't know the woman to know if she's racist or a 'bigot' as you say. I'm going to trust OP with this one because OP actually knows the person.
tantanpanda 26
#30, you're right you guys are misinterpreting the fml. OP said that he first got a packaged gift from his racist mother-in-law. Then he opened the package and found the squirt gun. Had he called her racist after recieving that, then you have a right to say he misused the term racist. Since he called her racist BEFORE he found out what was inside, this implies that he knows his mother-in-law has actually been racist in the past, giving OP uneasy feelings about the package before opening it. You can't really say that OP misused racist because he referred to the mother-in-law as racist before the opening of the package. IF you knew her personally, then sure, go ahead, but you probably don't.
garrett_8614 14
Who cares, she's a terrible person.
mishwarner 14
Um not sure how you don't get that this persons mother in law wants them dead because of their race? That means she thinks her race is superior
chosha_fml 27
#27 OP is speaking from experience that she is racist. The adjective doesn't have to refer to what she did here. But the fact that she suggested that he, a black man, take the toy gun and walk around the police station to (she hopes) get his 'black ass' shot sounds pretty racist to me.
coolbeansbruh 13
Are you serious? I'm pretty sure this captures racism accurately. We all know what racist means so quite saying stupid things.
sheila6368 6
Too bad she's your mother-in-law because I would call that a "hate crime"! She deserves jail!
xninix_fml 36
It's still kinda a hate crime though.
gennyv 29
It's not a hate crime, because no crime was committed. There was just somebody being really racist, bitchy, and anti festive
xninix_fml 36
@25 I guess that's true, but it was still a shitty thing to do.
dude_itskayley 17
The fact that it's holiday season, and somebody who is supposed to be your family, can come up with disrespectful "gifts" like this is just a mystery to me.
IvyRizzzzoli 25
Some people are just assholes....
ELoni_fml 25
Daaaaaaaaaaamn!
BadDay98 18
that is just ******* vile, sorry OP