Today, I got a bad cut on my dominant hand while at work. My boss decided to order me to juice lemons... all 300 of them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I cut my finger at work while chopping some vegetables. I grabbed the nearest rag I could to stop the bleeding and put it on the cut. I didn't know the rag had just been used to clean up a lemon juice spill. FML
Today, I received roughly 50 paper cuts while I was at work. I didn't realize this until after I applied hand sanitizer. FML
Today, I was cooking dinner for my children, managing for once not to screw up and hurt myself. Then, while chopping vegetables, I accidentally sliced my finger open. The same finger that was still covered in juice from a lemon I'd just squeezed. FML
Today, during a workplace safety exercise at work, I managed to cut off the tip of my thumb. FML
Today, I was making a shake at work when the cup fell off the blender. I went to catch it, and instead caught the teeth of the still-spinning mixer. When my hand was still bleeding five minutes later, my supervisor told me to clock out until it stopped. I lost money for getting hurt on the job. FML
Today, my manager bailed on me during the afternoon rush; swamped and distracted, I cut off the pad of my thumb in a cheese slicer. Some clinic hours later I returned, hungry and sick with blood loss, to sign WC papers. Manager's only words: "You're staying late to cover your long break, right?" FML
Today, I cut my finger with a knife while cooking. I work in a hospital and have to use hand disinfectant at least every twenty minutes. It hurts badly. I have to work for eight hours. FML
Today, I cut my hand on nothing while at work. It bled so much, I began to feel woozy, and everyone kept brushing me off when I asked where the first aid kits were. FML
Today, while I was at work in a machine shop, I cut myself really bad. Not with any of the sharp tools, drills, or metals I work with. Just the soap dispenser. FML
Today, my psycho boss snatched a file from my hand so aggressively that I got a papercut. She then scolded me for bleeding on the papers. FML
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Top comments
staynplay 0
isn't that unhygienic to be juicing lemons with a open wound, could easily get some blood in there and spread hep C.
AmandaJillx 6
wear gloves?
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Comments (155)
Cabbotage 0
wanker. seriously who cares if you're first.
MissGrinch 4
Did he know? If so, he's a sadist. ...I like him. >:) Kufufufufufu.
MissGrinch 4
I want to change my comment. I made an error. Did your boss know? If so, your boss is a sadist. ...I like your boss. >:) Kufufufufufu. -is in disbelief for assuming all men are jerks-
ClaireBear9087 0
this coming from the kid with the picture of a kitten with a silly hat. hmm. learn something new every day
MissGrinch 4
Excuse me, I am the kitteh!
pepsie_fml 0
dude. ur adorable!!!!
molil_4810 0
he's a dick head enough said…
lalalaloveit 0
15, your picture is sexxy (;
cole86 0
and ur not 4 having a picture of some naked dude?
brennboo 3
some naked dude?! that's taylor!!
brennboo 3
^emphasis on the "some"
blacknazi818 0
FIRST BIITCHES!!!
stormer461 13
False
bigredmonkeybutt 30
You lose.
blacknazi818 0
ur moms **** in my face ************!!!
LTFlames 0
FAIL
RedPillSucks 33
@35 my mother is dead, you necrophiliac bastard!
Shell02 0
HAHAH you suck. go back and cry inside your closet.
wowthatshorrible_fml 0
it's obviously a joke otherwise he's a dumbass
randomcory 0
yummy
TotallyTubular 0
lol.
naruske 4
i guess thats why she didn't move so much...
naruske 4
Meant for #35 :3
staynplay 0
isn't that unhygienic to be juicing lemons with a open wound, could easily get some blood in there and spread hep C.
Zebidee 9
^ Precisely this! You unhygienic bastard OP! 1) Preparing food = wear gloves 2) Cut on hand while dealing with food = wear gloves 3) Doing something where ouchy stuff can get into a cut = WEAR GLOVES!! FFS! Please let me know where your filthy, dangerous place of work is, so I can avoid it like the plague you obviously have no problem spreading to your customers.
girlfromUS 8
I so agree
SpicyDuck 22
That is unsanitary! You were making wound juice, not lemon juice!
MissErikaHart 0
gloves?
AmandaJillx 6
wear gloves?
AmandaJillx 6
wear gloves?
5t3ff1k4h 47
It's called gloves. Use them.
FFML_314 12
Gloves freak me out. All rubbery. I hate rubber! *Shudders* Yes, it's a strange phobia.
5t3ff1k4h 47
Don't like condoms, Anna? ;)
FFML_314 12
Sigh. I walked right into that one. No, I don't. Keep those slimy little bastards as far away from me as possible!
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Hehe. My ferret will steal and stash anything rubbery (ie shoe insoles, whole shoes, hairbrushes, pens and anything with a comfort grip, erasers, plastic packaging, etc). He gets so confused when I wear rubber gloves; he bites my fingers and tries to run off with them. For obvious reasons, we use alternate birth control. >.< /crazyferretmomness
RedPillSucks 33
Condoms are latex aren't they? What if your bf is allergic? he's swell up..... Ok, perhaps that's not a bad thing.
Schizomaniac 24
102, I hate you. I thought I was going to look clever by pointing that out. Sigh...
FFML_314 12
There's not a big difference to me. I'm not big on plastic wrap, rubber or anything that can be considered close to rubber.
Zebidee 9
So those giant Zorb balls you roll around in are right off your list I guess...