Today, I gave my friend condoms since he didn't have any and he was planning on "getting lucky." Little did I know he was planning on "getting lucky" with my sister. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Today, as I was going to hook up with a sex friend, I discovered that my pack of condoms was missing. Then I saw my sister chewing out her two 10-year-old twins, who'd found them in my drawer. This how my family, who had visited me for family dinner, found out about my sexual life. FML
Today, my best friend informed me that he had lost his virginity to my sister, which I already knew. However, he told me the location. My room. While I was asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML
Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML
Today, I found out that when I asked my buddy to make sure my girlfriend was safe while I was abroad, he really did; he even used a condom. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
Today, while I was in the middle of making love with my boyfriend, I mentioned bringing another woman in the picture to spice it up. He looked at me and said, "Let's ask your sister." He then got dressed and called her. FML
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Top comments
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Well you kept your sister safe.
whythankyou 19
"Friend", huh?
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Comments (126)
Pizzapiggy1 18
Well at least she won't get pregnant ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Shrllxx 13
At least you protected your sister!
thejonac 21
imagine you played the good big brother role even when you didn't know it
quesok 22
Hopefully she shot him down and he didn't get any further than the planning stage
assassinbanana0 20
Why? What if she was into it, too?
gracehi 33
What? Your sister can't play with your friend too?
CurlyQute 17
Wow. What a great friend.
Witchylady 18
Well it's better than him getting lucky with your girlfriend.
spencer353 15
What a motherf***er.....or...sister...
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Sure, it's all fun and games till it's your sister getting screwed.
Florentina 17
...So? Your sister can have sex with whoever she wants.
Eyalsh 32
yes. but a real friend doesn't go forth with his friend's sister. it's just the so-called brocode. i know the name is cheesy, but i promise you, it ruins friendships, i talk out of experience. my friend's sister is friend zoned as Default. how'd you like your best friend humping your brother- let alone behind your back.
DoomedGemini 38
As long as neither of them are getting hurt I wouldn't really care. I'd care more about their happiness if it was a relationship. If it's a one night stand I don't really want to know about that. In fact one of my friend HAS had sex with my brother. Don't really care.