Today, I gave my friend condoms since he didn't have any and he was planning on "getting lucky." Little did I know he was planning on "getting lucky" with my sister. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went into my older brother's room to get a condom. This happened the other day too when my boyfriend forgot one. So I went in and there was a note that said, "Stop using my condoms. And your boyfriend sounds like a girl when he climaxes." FML
Today, as I was going to hook up with a sex friend, I discovered that my pack of condoms was missing. Then I saw my sister chewing out her two 10-year-old twins, who'd found them in my drawer. This how my family, who had visited me for family dinner, found out about my sexual life. FML
Today, my best friend informed me that he had lost his virginity to my sister, which I already knew. However, he told me the location. My room. While I was asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend slept with my sister. "Accidentally", apparently. FML
Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag. FML
Today, I found out that when I asked my buddy to make sure my girlfriend was safe while I was abroad, he really did; he even used a condom. FML
Today, my mom stole the condoms out of my room and gave them to my little brother because I "won't be needing them anytime soon". FML
Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML
Today, during sex I wasn’t really into it so I was letting my mind wander and it randomly settled on my sister's birthday and how I needed to buy a gift. As my husband seemed like he was about to finish, I faked my orgasm and accidentally moaned my sister's name. He heard me, so now he’s "concerned". FML
Today, while I was in the middle of making love with my boyfriend, I mentioned bringing another woman in the picture to spice it up. He looked at me and said, "Let's ask your sister." He then got dressed and called her. FML
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Top comments
Earl_KarmasBitch 36
Well you kept your sister safe.
whythankyou 19
"Friend", huh?
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Comments (126)
afitz200 11
At least he had protection
ADBurns 22
S O B ... I would be furious - also I would tell your sister to gross her out. It may mean her thinking twice next time...
Joshawott 21
Better than him knocking up your sister or giving her a vajayjay virus though.
Vestin 18
Are you hoping to get lucky with your own sister? No? Then don't spoil the fun for those who are. The fact that she can make her own decisions aside, it's a plus-sum game. The sister wins, the friend wins, the brother isn't affected. It's illogical to mind.
gunnerblaster 21
It has nothing to do with the fact that it's his own sister - It's more along the lines of, "Your friend's using you to bang your sister." Which is some messed up stuff because it's basically 'easy access'.
ShadowGenius 12
That's a serious breach of bro code. No matter how gorgeous and awesome she may be, a friend's sister is always off limits.
platypus546 24
you won't be an uncle. I suppose that's a plus?
Benjamin_silver 12
Ron Weasley, is that you?
dohdohdoh 13
How does this suck? Unless it's illegal or he's gonna nut and run then it's all good. Would u rather she was with a nonamer to treat her bad?
vikky538 29
OP:here are those condoms bruh... OP's friend: eshhh..don't call me bro...
migmit 11
IDGI. Did you want to keep your sister for yourself?