Today, I gave a safe sex speech to teens at my local high school. This was just ten minutes after my girlfriend had texted me telling me she's pregnant. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was pregnant. We haven't had sex yet. FML
Today, I went with my son to a conference about sexual education at his high school. I guess it was all too late, because among the attendees I saw three girls from the same high school who were already pregnant. They aren't even 18. FML
Today, my fiancée, who believes in "sex after marriage" like me, told me she was pregnant. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
Today, my mom gave me a talk on safe sex. During a three hour car ride. With my friends in the back seat. FML
Today, after ranting to my best friend about how all our friends are having kids and how teenage pregnancy will ruin their lives, she announced to me that she's pregnant. FML
Today, my 19-year-old son told me his girlfriend is pregnant, and was diagnosed with an STD. He's sure that he's the father. He's also sure he doesn't have an STD, because he's a virgin. I had to give him the sex talk that his school never did, as well as explain to him that his girlfriend is a cheater. FML
Today, I sat my mom down to tell her I was pregnant, but before I could say anything, she started to lecture me on safe sex. I don't see this ending well. FML
Today, at my job as a second grade teacher, I was explaining to my students how I'm pregnant and will have to take a break from teaching after I have my baby. One of my students replied with "Ooooooooohhh Ms. Johnson had sex!" FML
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Top comments
HSOMGF 5
Who tells someone they're pregnant in a text? Don't people talk face to face anymore? Sad and YTDI.
you_failed 15
Wow, what irony! D: I hope you DID have safe sex. If you didn't YDI.
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Comments (140)
jewels1877 0
And this is when the sex tape is leaked to all the teens and they see you're a phony! And then teen pregnancy skyrockets.
TakeOneLastBreat_fml 0
maybes he was trying to have a baby and he isn't a hypocrite?
screamo_neve 12
Maybe he decided to give a speech on safe sex because he knew he didn't have safe sex?? Possibility.
xxmollyxx 25
Ooooor... condoms and the Pill aren't always 100% safe. We could also assume this happened, since he apparently is "in to" safe sex. No protection is 100% fool proof, unfortunately.
EVELYNandDIEGO 0
You knew better, you should have gave yourself the same speech. :D It happens sometimes I believe things happens for a reason. 1. Maybe learn your lesson 2. Change your life 3. ???? If, you end up keeping your child are you going to tell him/her it was a "mistake" ? You should be happy. :D
ManaUser 0
Congrats!
roydawgg 3
safe sex speech? how about wait till your 18 speech?
Frickmetinajenks 0
Lolirony
MaxEvans 0
how sad that people now days think safe sex is to keep from getting pregnant. Yeah, it has nothing to do with all the diseases you can get. It is just about preventing pregnancy. I guess it's true that ignorance is bliss.
DaveOnDope 4
Herpes, HIV. The gifts that keeps on giving.
underguarded 20
Your right. Schools should totally not inform anyone about Safe Sex. Besides, what's the education in that?
abasio 1
Is she pregnant with disease?