Today, I found that there is nothing worse than coming home to a snake slithering across your kitchen floor. Except when it disappears into your cabinets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML
Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML
Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML
Today, when going to fill up the kettle, I noticed a bad smell and pieces of something coming out of the tap. Turns out there was a dead snake in my water supply. FML
Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML
Today, when I warned my guests to check the toilet for snakes, I meant it. FML
Today, I went out to get milk from the garage fridge for my mom. The moment I stepped out, my foot settled on the neighbor's boa, who likes to escape. After my mom finally opened the door to my frantic shouting, she spotted the snake, slammed the door, and locked both of us outside. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, my cat decided to show me just how much he loves me by bringing a live snake into my bedroom. Thanks. FML
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Top comments
slitherbomb 0
At least it wasn't a naked man slithering across your kitchen floor…
cbaidchris 6
Snaaaaake, snaaaaaake, ohhhhh itttssss aaa snaaaaake...
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Comments (168)
TRIPPYXS 0
maybe it will poop in ur cereal .....can snskes poop?
sara_saturday 5
everybody poops.
Susieee_Q 9
I wouldn't say there's "nothing" worse than that.... I can think of plenty of things worse than a snake. Say, the holocaust is worse than a snake. Being brutally killed is worse than a snake. Any natural disaster is worse than a snake. Listening to Lil' Wayne or Katy Perry is worse than a snake. Hell, even two snakes is worse than a snake. Although it is still not ideal, so I'll give you this one.
TheNewGuy03 29
...what about being brutally killed by a snake? I mean, it can sneak up behind you, kill you in silence, and hide the evidence...or is that a different snake? ANSWER ME!
Susieee_Q 9
Oh, boy. Well, brutally killing in silence would be a challenge in the first place. Nearly impossible. But assuming it happens, being silently, brutally killed by a snake who has the capacity to hide its evidence is still far worse than the a snake who hides in your kitchen. At least, I sure hope it's a different snake....
disconinja924 5
did u honestly just diss weezy?!? lol
munny_fml 7
Jeez where the hell do u live op, The zoo?
catnip1997 0
how did a snake get in your cabinet? snakes don't fly...o wait..
DeathBunny218 37
well instead of going into your cabinet it could have eaten your pets and bit you, so yeah there are loads of things that could be worse. And if it is too small to do any of those things i really don't see a problem here.
bettyc4 26
...is it me or does anyone else see how sexual this is...?
brycehostens 0
Trouser snake :p
LilaBear 2
Disappearing into your cabinets is GOOD. That means you can go close the cabinet, lock it (or block it somehow) to trap the snake there, then call a reptile handler to come and remove it. It's better knowing where it is trapped than not knowing where it is in the house.
nightwanderer 6
Yep it's Indiana Jones
head2133 12
how about you waking up to a snake slithering across your bed. I would shit myself if that happened