Today, I found that there is nothing worse than coming home to a snake slithering across your kitchen floor. Except when it disappears into your cabinets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up to an angry snake trying to climb the leg of my bed. My bedroom was closed all day yesterday. It must have gotten in my room days ago. FML
Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML
Today, my son's glasses were missing. My bathroom is not well lit, but I noticed something sticking out from under the toilet seat. I excitedly grabbed it, thinking I saw the band of the glasses. Nope, it was a snake. FML
Today, when going to fill up the kettle, I noticed a bad smell and pieces of something coming out of the tap. Turns out there was a dead snake in my water supply. FML
Today, my mother found my escaped pet snake after she had already washed and dried it with the laundry. FML
Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML
Today, when I warned my guests to check the toilet for snakes, I meant it. FML
Today, I went out to get milk from the garage fridge for my mom. The moment I stepped out, my foot settled on the neighbor's boa, who likes to escape. After my mom finally opened the door to my frantic shouting, she spotted the snake, slammed the door, and locked both of us outside. FML
Today, my 6 ft snake got loose. I found it. It was in my neighbor's backyard, constricting their pet rabbit. FML
Today, my cat decided to show me just how much he loves me by bringing a live snake into my bedroom. Thanks. FML
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Top comments
slitherbomb 0
At least it wasn't a naked man slithering across your kitchen floor…
cbaidchris 6
Snaaaaake, snaaaaaake, ohhhhh itttssss aaa snaaaaake...
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Comments (168)
Amrel 10
The sequal to snakes on a plane. Snakes in a cabinet!!!!!
salvorican 24
I had a snake hide behind my dishwasher. I think that should be the sequel to the sequel :D
itsalanis 25
hmm, this is how i got my pet snake a few years back.
omgcookeys 15
At least it didn't attack you! I hope you called animal control immediately. Snakes are awesome, but can be very dangerous as most people know.
reptileguy1296 0
Ummm... No. The only venomous snakes in the U.S. are Rattlesnakes, Cottonmouths, Copperheads, and Coral snakes. This is out of almost a thousand species. I guarantee you, if the snake ran (or slithered rather) away, it is nonvenomous. I can tell you from experience, venomous ones stay and fight (I've worked with Cobras, most Rattlesnake species, Gaboon Vipers, and more).
kelsey_katie 17
Firetruck! OP, that sucks... And is a frighting... What di you do with the snake?!
justysgirl 3
Stuff the snake in your shoe and then you can say "there's a snake in my boot"
kelsey_katie 17
But, tha only works If it's a boot, and you're woody from toy story.... But i like your thinking(:
CharlieeMurphy 0
Boooooooooooooooooooooo #10 kicks yo ass
disconinja924 5
hah.....toy story quotes.....
xlorawrz 9
Why are you on FML if there is a snake loose in your house?
salvorican 24
He's gotta do something while he stays locked up in the bathroom
BIEBERSLAYER 10
I'm sick of these mother fuckingsnakes in this mother ******* kitchen!
omgcookeys 15
FYL, you should check for any openings in your walls...
BIEBERSLAYER 10
I'm sick of these mother ******* snakes on this mother ******* floor!
BIEBERSLAYER 10
Why does it keep double posting dammit! this is the second time in like 5 mins
TaylorTotsYumm 10
How'd it get out of your pants?