Today, I found out where the mysterious bites on my back keep coming from. It's not every day you find an earwig in your loofah. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I went to the bathroom, I found an earwig in my underpants. Yes, it was alive. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
Today, I discovered that it is possible for bugs to lay eggs in your ears. FML
Today, after a few days of getting what seemed like an odd, scattered rash every time I showered, I finally figured out the problem. It turns out I wasn't just allergic to all the different soap I tried. Apparently a family of very angry spiders have decided to make my loofah their new home. FML
Today, while I was in the shower, I noticed a short, black hair on my loofah. I ignored it and lathered up my entire body with it. When I put it back down, a roach crawled out of it. What I thought was a black hair was in fact its antenna. FML
Today, I found the same spider which I had let live yesterday hidden in my bath towel. I didn't find it until it was smeared on my face. FML
Today, I was smoking a cigarette outside and kept thinking I saw something moving out of the corner of my eye. I would look and there was nothing there, so I kept brushing it off. Finally I figured out it was an earwig crawling through my hair. FML
Today, at work, a lady came in to have her glasses fixed. When she opened her case, an earwig crawled out. Instead of trying to kill it, she just left it and watched as it crawled over my desk and behind my computer. I later found the earwig in my hair. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for what I thought was a persistent bug bite. Turns out it was a mole I'd never noticed. I had been scratching it then applying anti-itch cream for weeks. FML
Today, I was awoken by a slug crawling down my back. FML
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Top comments
Cheeley 17
Hey, if someone kept squishing you against someone's back in the shower, I bet you'd bite them too.
Wizzlbang 10
Earwigs don't bite, OP. Even their pinchers wont leave any sort of characteristic bug bite. Sounds like you got more than Earwigs in your loofas lurking about your house.
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Comments (107)
Dogluvr1197 30
I found a giant ant crawling around in my loofah a few days ago. Yeah, I threw it away haha
toritilla947920 6
It's not like I wanted to go shower or anything now. -_-
Aligator67 12
I don't know what a loofah is, but I just know how much I hate those earwig things. One time, I was just sitting there and felt something move in my shirt. It was an earwig.
HeatherFeatherB 31
I refuse to buy or use loofahs anymore because I found a spider living in mine once.
kmk1998 15
How in the world...? ??