Today, I found out it takes no special training to put a large glass marble up my nostril but may require someone with a medical degree to remove it. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML
Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML
Today, I heard on a TV show that it's possible to fit a standard light-bulb in your mouth, but it can't be removed afterwards. I just had to try this out. And then visit the local hospital to get it removed. FML
Today, and for over week, one of my nostrils has been stuffed to the point I can't breathe through it. I tried nasal spray and blowing it out, but nothing worked. I wanted to go to the doctor but first, I used a flashlight and a pair of tweezers. The giant, crusted booger bullet I pulled out was as long as my palm. FML
Today, I had to take my fiancé to the hospital so they could remove a tampon applicator that he claimed he somehow "fell onto". It was lodged up his nostril. I'm marrying this man in a week. FML
Today, I woke up with a really annoying bogey blocking my nose. Eventually, I just covered the other nostril and snorted as hard as I could. Good news, it came flying out. Bad news, it landed in my eye. FML
Today, I got a tooth pulled out. I now have a hole connecting my mouth to my nose. Drinking and eating is whole new experience. FML
Today, I dropped some glass at my job while putting it on the shelf. A shard bounced off the floor and went up my nose. FML
Today, I found out that when you put Kleenex up your nose to stop it from constantly draining snot, it is possible for it to rip and get stuck in your nose when you try to take it out. Words cannot describe how incredibly uncomfortable that was. FML
Today, at the age of 27, I learnt that your tonsils aren't the dangly bit at the back of your throat. I work in healthcare. FML
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Top comments
EarAcheMyEYE10 2
Moron... really... did ya try any other holes first? if so, I hope you told the ER doc!!
Evarella 8
This is just downright stupid.
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Comments (116)
wazdog 4
What else do you like putting in your holes?
no_clue_4_u 4
Congratulations, this makes you as intelligent as a toddler.
Youdrongo 0
How insulting! Toddlers are definitely smarter than that!
saIty 17
No, but it takes a degree of stupidity to attempt something dumb like that.
o76923 8
I thought the OP's name was Baby at first and a parent was posting on behalf of their infant. I suppose Beaky could be a petname for a baby...
SkardeyKat 3
Lol you know I was thinking something similar. If this is someone older than eight, I really hope they never reproduce.
MainPrism 16
Duh, dipshit...
Miss_Attitude96 24
It actually takes a degree of STUPIDITY, congrats.
Miss_Attitude96 24
Shoot, didn't see you, 19. My bad.
wriptidez 0
weird.. glad u got it
hello_jules 8
..And you're how old?
WaSiSimiLang 8
Congratz on your stupidity. In such situations, inhale deeply through mouth. Then, stick a finger firmly up the nostril with no blockage. Finally blow out through your nose with your mouth closed for all that you're worth. If it doesn't work, good luck to you, but you deserve it
thisisafunnyname 12
I did that before! Except I was three.