Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy this past summer after our son was born and only took one of the two tests. I haven't cheated. He refuses to believe me or get his spunk checked again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Mystery
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband had a vasectomy several years ago. I've been faithful the whole time, but he wouldn't believe me, even after I showed him that vasectomies can reverse themselves. FML
Today, I found out that the reason I hadn't gotten pregnant yet was because my husband had a vasectomy after the birth of his son. He even had the nerve to continously tell me, "it'll happen soon, baby" and let me believe we were trying. FML
Selfish
Today, I found out that the reason I hadn't gotten pregnant yet was because my husband had a vasectomy after the birth of his son. He even had the nerve to continously tell me, "it'll happen soon, baby" and let me believe we were trying. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
Buckle up!
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant with our third child. This wouldn't be a problem but we only want two kids and I had a vasectomy 6 weeks ago (they take 3 months to be effective). We weren't careful only one time, and since it was difficult to conceive the two we wanted, we didn't think it would be a problem. FML
Today, I found out that even after having had my tubes tied, I am in fact pregnant. I have an 8-month-old son and his father just remarried another woman 2 months ago. Neither of them believe that the new baby is his. FML
Today, I found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I are divorcing because HE had an affair. He now wants a paternity test. FML
Legal issues
Today, a judge ruled against me. I filed for divorce because my wife got pregnant even though I had a vasectomy. Apparently, not informing your spouse of a vasectomy is worse than cheating in the eyes of the court. FML
Alexa, play "Confusion" by New Order
Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML
Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML
Top comments
13ky13 20
Damn mailmen...
herpderpherpderp 13
blame it on the dog.
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Comments (164)
ALlamaOnFire 20
There's always Jerry!
ebdeadaccount 11
Or explosions...
hunny797 5
Wat was the moderated comment??
herpderpherpderp 13
blame it on the dog.
ebdeadaccount 11
That sound like an awfully disturbing explanation
weveevee 3
What if they don't gave a dog? A cat maybe?
alexsam_fml 10
what is wrong with you?!!
Keevarou 17
Blame the kid!
GothickNihilist 15
#6 They can always blame you GIR.
HarmDis 3
40's profile picture fits his comment so well.
whirlednews 8
She's funny.
S182 15
IWHBYD....
S182 15
.
da_directioner39 17
27 - A cat is fine, too.
KindaFunnyRight 8
I'm sorry but 43 went to far that is disgusting
PB4UGAME 8
Bet few people got that reference. . .
ohcheriecherie 20
119 incest is too far; ********** is not? Huh. It's all old jokes to me....
Keevarou 17
Sorry 119 :P I take incest and ********** easily :) No need to be dead serious all the time is what I feel
dead247 13
Blame the donkey.
TheOnlyX 11
Incest is the best, put your family to the test.
13ky13 20
Damn mailmen...
Sam_Dchi 23
you got yourself a smart one. also congratulations for the baby
outoftown 27
Congratulations?! Her husband got a vasectomy; they didn't WANT another child. Did you congratulate the OP who had an apartment fire, too?
Virginia6810 16
Wow, 97. I would never put an unplanned baby in the same category as an apartment fire. No matter how much you didn't want another baby you will still love it.
Sam_Dchi 23
It doesn't matter whether the baby was planned or not because she got pregnant, now unless they decide to have an abortion then I believe congratulations are in order
outoftown 27
101 - "No matter how much you didn't want another baby you will still love it." Really? Talk with your local child protective services, and see if they agree. 102 - Oh? What other unplanned and unwanted events do you congratulate people about? How well do they take such congratulations? Seems like you want to make yourself feel better, not OP. Try "Best of luck."
7yzz 18
@101 umm no wouldnt, you would get an abortion, which would be the smart thing to do, not take on a burden into your life for the sake of a Religious or some other confused belief. Giving birth changes the body massively. I hate when people say 'Congratulations' even when OP has made it crystal clear that she and her husband DONT want another child. I dont think you congratulate someone for having to get an abortion, its not appropriate.
pokemonchick14 12
I'm not necessarily disagreeing with what you're saying, but calling a child a "burden" is going a tad far..
7yzz 18
Might be a harsh word but its true, the child isnt wanted, OP might not have enough to support it, it will change her body and wear it out, it could be traumatic for OP to give birth to it, it'll be in their life for at least 18 years. And they dont want a child at all. I think that passes for the word 'burden'. Its the same as if someone had a child too young and they are emotionally, mentally or financially ready to give birth and look after a kid, it becomes more of a burden than a blessing. Smart thing to do is use contraception to avoid this in the first place, which OP did, but still got the shitty end of the stick. FYL OP.
TheWindowLicker 13
Someone here, and I won't say who, is taking a little too much offense over a dumb comment.
Virginia6810 16
103, chill. They already have at least one other child. My guess is they will love this one after the initial shock subsides.
DropBearMeat 23
I'll stand up for outoftown, here. This isn't an event worthy of congratulations. Yes, lots of people really love kids, but they're also a lifelong investment of time, energy, and money and practically everyone stops having more at some point precisely for those reasons. Save the congratulations for people who have been trying hard and failing to have a kid and finally succeed at it. They're happy to hear the well wishes.
DropBearMeat 23
Perhaps his comparison was a bit harsh and hyperbolic, but it's not exactly wrong, either. Think about the tough decision it is to make when you're so absolutely certain you don't want any more kids that you'll go to a doctor and have a surgery to make sure of it. Lots of people struggle with that decision, and it's one that both parents have to make together. Relationships have been strained and ended over an inability to come to an agreement on the decision, and it's not like it's a decision where compromises are possible. It's all-or-nothing. It's respectful of that hard decision to withhold the traditional congratulations, since they were more certain than most couples ever are that they don't want more kids.
randi8907 3
hey 103 how about Stfu and butt ur nosy a$$ out of what people wanna say. bullsh-- he can't say congrats, he can say whatever he wants.....
deloria_fml 22
You hear about this happening a lot. You have my sympathies, OP. As you either clearly don't want or are incapable of finally supporting another child, I'd suggest not having it.
ALlamaOnFire 20
It doesn't seem like OP is against having another child, it's just not what they planned. Abortion is an option that should be well thought about. Also it wouldn't help the situation, OPs husband would still think she is cheating.
CatchMe25 16
Deloria...the fml doesn't say anything about their financial state or ability to take care of another child. To say so makes you a judgmental idiot like OPs husband. It's an unexpected pregnancy which is extremely common after vasectomies.
misslifeguard 7
Abortion is wrong
dmoran20 27
Just think deloria, if your parents would of thought the same then I wouldn't have read such a screwed up comment...
evilvagina 9
your face is wrong... opinion yes, mine,yes. keep yours to yourself!
Roskie 16
#19 Care to prove it?
Ariana386 3
Really? That has to Be one of the most ignorant posts I've read on here, n that is saying something, Deloria.... Wow... How do u know they don't want the child or are incapable of taking care of it? I had my tubes tied at 33 bc of the increased risk of having a Downs Syndrome baby (or other age-related risk factor). There was nothing wrong with me, my pocketbook, or my ability to want/love another child. I was doing what I felt was the responsible thing
jarockstar27 10
Look at the growth of a "fetus" and when they develop life sustaining organs. They are not just a cell but growing humans inside the mom. Sorry i will never buy the "lump of tissue" crap. If you truly wanted to find out if they are alive you would do the research instead of spout hate towards pro life people.
supportcommand 17
#19-Who are you to tell them what's right or wrong? I bet you're one of those people that has nothing better to do than picket abortion clinics and push your beliefs on other people. I feel sorry for you.
fml121785 14
19- Your statement is posted as if it's a fact, it's your opinion that it's wrong and based on your thumb downs not the opinion of the majority.
TxCountryBeauty 10
Why is it that the pro choice comments are all getting thumbed up but pro life are getting thumbed down? We are each entitled to our opinion and others shouldn't be looked down upon because of what they believe. The moral of this thread is far low. The pro lifers aren't shoving their beliefs down just adding them so they can to be heard.
happle 21
Probably because people think pro life isn't fair. The decision of whether or not to keep the pregnancy should up to the mother and father of the unborn baby and no one else.
CheeseHater 23
So your only choice is to birth the baby and then do a DNA check. And since he got a vasectomy it doesn't sound like you want children. You're stuck.
deloria_fml 22
It's risky, but she could have the child's paternity checked in utero. As to what I said regarding abortions, if someone is willing to undergo an often quite painful procedure and potential complications to ensure that no more children are born, it generally means they really, really don't want to have more.
CatchMe25 16
And yet amazingly it doesn't mean that they can't afford it, aren't capable enough to raise or even that they won't love it. What it does mean is that there was a reason they got it done....you just don't know that it's because they really, really, really don't want more kids.
ophel1a 7
25- well, considering the TOP reason for snipping is to prevent unwanted pregnancy...i don't understand the controversy in making that generalized assumption about OP's husband.
jizzwold 21
Deloria, I totally see what you are saying and I understand that you were just giving common reasons for the op and her husbands' decision to have a vasectomy but once you get on the bad side of this many people on fml there is really no salvaging your reputation or explaining what you meant. Try again in another thread at a later date.
CatchMe25 16
I have to admit that my comment was born out of frustration to Deloria's comment that seems to have been removed. Telling Op to get an abortion because they are obviously incapable of raising a child or financially affording one. While I'm aware of the most common reason to get a vasectomy I was just pointing out that there are many other reasons.
ohSNAPyall 27
22 Don't put your baby at risk because your husband is acting like a child.
testestestes123 4
Tell him that Joseph was much more understanding and believed Mary and he should too.
abbiex 6
He will come around
Enslaved 38
I doubt Mary and the OP have the same baby daddy, :P
S182 15
Joseph was gonna divorce marry until an angel told him not too...
klutz44 28
Ah yes, the Jesus excuse. Works about once every couple thousand years or so. Worth a try.
dmoran20 27
It happens, my wife had her tubes tied and almost two years later our third child was born. Congrats on the little one, hubby will come around!
ohcheriecherie 20
How did that work? Curiosity...
mario2012 18
Dat username.
Connect 10
Thank god for DNA tests.