Today, I found one of my mom's old diaries that dated back to my infant days. I couldn't help but read a little. I'm now in great concern over how many times my mom wrote that she wanted to dunk me in the toilet or throw me against a wall. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found my long lost diary and curiously read it. What's worse than finding out that your mother read your diary? Finding out that your mother wrote comments in it. FML
Today, my mom read my diary. Then she frantically booked me an appointment with a psychiatrist. FML
Today, I found my diary on my mother's nightstand. Bookmarked. FML
Today, feeling very distant from my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML
Today, I rummaged around in the attic, looking for old pictures of me and my family, so I could make a surprise collage. Instead, I found my dad's old journals, talking about how desperately he didn't want a kid, and how he wanted to leave my mother more and more every day that passed since I was born. FML
Today, my dad found and read my diary. Most of the entries were about how my father didn't respect my privacy. Then he phoned my aunt and read her passages from it. FML
Today, I was helping my mom look for some money she'd misplaced. At my wit's end, I flipped through her diary, in case she'd hidden it between the pages as she has before. Didn't find the money, but I did find out she might well be cheating on my dad. FML
Today, I took a look at my 9-year-old daughter's diary, thinking it would be full of cute stuff. Instead, it was full of hateful rants against me and my husband, as well the boys at her school, who she called gay because none of them ever hit on her. It seems I've failed as a parent. FML
Today, my therapist asked me if I’d been journaling as he suggested. I had to tell him that I don’t trust writing down my innermost thoughts anymore, because when I was younger my mom read by diary multiple times and beat me for what I wrote. So did my ex-boyfriend. FML
Today, I found a notebook my 12-year-old sister had been doodling in. Turns out the "doodles" were poems full of obscenities and descriptions of how she wanted to hurt herself. When I showed it to my mom, she accused me of writing the notebook myself to frame my sister. FML
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Top comments
MandyMeow_fml 18
That's true motherly love
emilyjgraham 34
I'm sure you'll understand one day, not that every mother wants to use violence, but how stressful having a child can be. Maybe your mother went through post natal depression but wasn't diagnosed, it happens. Just let it slide, I'm sure she's happy now. She might not want to remember the feelings she had. :)
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Comments (179)
TheIchiban 11
That's what happens when you read personal things you shouldn't be reading in the first place.
Driveshaft 5
Don't be concerned at all. You will understand once you have children.
DaGrimRetard 8
At least your mom's wasn't filled with sexual fantasys. Shudders* I never want to meet anyone named Fabio now.
Harlequin073 6
Yikes!
twiztedone 19
Hormones are a bitch to a lot of females after giving birth and even up until about 2 years later. Scary enough these thoughts are normal, she didn't act on them or you wouldn't be here writing this. Be thankful she didn't act on them and think about how life has been since you can remember.
Calyx_fml 22
Think about the lyrics to rock a bye baby. It's common.
skyeyez9 25
Honestly, it is normal to feel so exasperated with a newborn to have those thoughts cross your mind. Severe sleep deprivation (waking up every 2hrs), crying, constant diaper changing, hormones making you feel even more moody. Its worse if your baby has colic and screams for HOURS nonstop and nothing will console him/her. If your baby is sick or has diarrhea, teething they are more whiny and cry more....hearing the constant crying which is surprisingly loud will wear down even the toughest person.
skyeyez9 25
Your entire life is set around your baby's sleep, nap and feeding cycle. It is tough the first year of being a first time mom.
lyndz_20 8
I have an 11-month-old and I can tell you that your mom's thoughts were completely normal. My angel was colicky and there were nights when she'd sleep only two hours or not at all. I started thinking about giving her up for adoption or just taking her to some veld and leaving her there. It's HARD raising a baby, you'll find out when you have your own
sgidey10 4
It's cool just tell her and ask her if she's ok now
downtime 13
35, Something tells me your role in your childs life is heavily supported and that your girlfriend is the one who does most of the work when your parents aren't able to help out.