Today, I finally told my roommate, who doesn't pay rent, to go get a job. He left, came back, and immediately went to my refrigerator to eat. I asked him about his job and what his pay is. Apparently, putting together a bike for a kid is a job. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML
Today, after moving in with a friend I've known for 9 years, I found out he's going to jail soon, and refuses to work or get a new job, making me unable to pay rent as he eats all my food. FML
Today, I finally told my dad that he owes me over 400 dollars, and that I need it or else I'd get kicked out of my apartment. He only gave me 70 and said to get a better job. FML
Today, as I was leaving home for my mall kiosk job, my dad asked me where I was off to. When I said I was going to work, he tossed an empty beer bottle to the floor, belched, and said "Bah! Get a REAL job!" He's unemployed and living in my apartment. FML
Today, my roommate and I had to pay our first installment of rent. He's nowhere to be found. FML
Today, my roommate played a crazy April Fool's joke on me by not paying his rent this month. Good one. FML
Today, the guy I live with demanded that I get a job or start paying rent. It'd be perfectly reasonable, if he wasn't my husband, and if I hadn't just given birth to our first child. FML
Today, I texted my flatmate to ask him when he would be paying his portion of the rent, since he has told me he would be late this month. He wrote back to inform me that he had moved out last night while I was away, and that he won't be paying me anything. FML
Today, after I've been cleaning a hostel 7/7 for free accommodation for a few weeks, and the owner telling me 3 times to take a day off while he was able to do the job, I'm finally leaving. He's now (and only now) asking me to pay for the 3 nights I "didn't work for." FML
Today, I told my roommates they have to go get jobs, because I can't afford to support them or their bad habits any more. They responded by pawning all my DVDs for cash to buy cigarettes. FML
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Top comments
groupleader 7
Yes a bike job is also known as a bj.
I_Punch_Babies 7
you already know his weakness is the refrigerator. dont go grocery shopping and just get.a days worth of food each time you go out. thatll force him to get a real job.
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Comments (81)
MrFuzzles 5
Lock the fridge, cabinets, Password the computers, lock everything then see how fast he gets a job. Or if you're lucky he'll go freeload of someone else. Don't let this bum walk all over you!
Myo_fml 20
All of the people thumbing down the "kick him out" posts must be freeloading wastes of space themselves. A roommate's responsibility is to have a job to help make rent cheaper for everyone. He did not take the OP's request seriously, wasted food, did not hold up his responsibility and so deserves to be tossed out onto the street.
kdmozzfreak 2
wow sounds like this roomate sucks. down with the fridge!
Myo_fml 20
Popcorn Dum Dums. :P
tony1891 22
sounds like it's time for a new roommate. someone with a bachelor's degree preferably
OfficeNinja 5
Kick the fool out! If you did not get your roommate to sign an agreement splitting the rent, you are the fool. Get that paper signed and when your roommate can't show he is paying anything - you can boot the lazy ass right out. Just like your landlord can boot you out if you don't pay. Laws vary by state, if your name is the only one on the lease you may be able to kick your roommate out now. If your name is not on the lease, move out and let whatever happens happen. If both your names are on the lease - still move out and let whatever happens happen.
kinkygirl89 1
Kick him out
wlddog 14
Your profile pick has made me hungry
spottyblanket 8
You have every right to remove a roomate who doesn't pay rent. You aren't a bank
AnneeSo 6
Just kick him out. Tell him to go pound salt.
estes816 9
Butter rum dum dum