Today, I fell off my bike. I grazed my knee, shin, thigh, hip, collar bone, shoulder and face. I also strained my wrist. As I was wheeling my bike away, I stung my other leg on nettles. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went dirtbiking. While I was going down a hill, I spun out of control and flipped over my handle bars. I now have a sprained arm, multiple bruises and a crescent-shaped gash on my neck that looks like I was bitten. People are asking if my boyfriend and I were being frisky last night. FML
Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML
Today, I was riding my bike when I passed a derelict house that recently burned. Curious, I dismounted and went inside. I stepped on a nail, and while I was staggering in agony, I hit a weak spot in the floor and broke my other leg. FML
Today, I was having motorbike lessons. We were parked by the side of the circuit when one side of my gloves dropped on the ground. I tried to pick it up without getting off the bike. I lost balance, fell off the bike and the bike landed on my leg, trapping me. FML
Today, I was riding my scooter at a skate park. I was wearing a helmet, but I got hot, so I took it off. Within the next minute, I fell off my scooter and cut my head open. I had to get four stitches. FML
Today, I was riding my bike along a road and a deer jumped out from the tree line, knocking me to the ground and breaking my arm. Someone pulled over to see if I was alright, running over my bike in the process. FML
Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML
Today, I was riding my bike and swerved to avoid hitting a lizard. I ended up sliding into a bush and skinning myself, only to find my tires had still managed to cut the lizard to pieces. FML
Today, I was riding a longboard down a hill and I fell off. I was all scraped up so I made sure to clean my wounds and put bandages on them. Turns out I'm allergic to the glue on the bandages and I have itchy hives all over and around my open wounds. FML
Today, I was sent to the hospital after being hit by a car while on my bicycle. The police officer said it was my fault for not looking, even though the car pulled up without looking. I now have a small herniated disc in my neck and abrasions on my thigh. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
takeapieandrun 9
How did you manage graze so many things at the same time? Lol.
CloudEnvy 17
Strike me down if i'm being stupid.. But: I'm pretty sure the brakes don't rely on the chain.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (182)
PROBLEMS99 0
DID IT HURT
blakerzzz 0
Yea well I kinda ripped my nutsack open on my handle bars
Splayd 10
For me, this is one of the weirdest things I've ever read. You "grazed" various parts of your body, rather than "scraped". You "strained" your wrist rather than "spraining" it. And you were stung by "nettles," something I have never heard of. Whaaaaa--!
Pugs_not_drugs 9
seriosly ,u dont know what stinging nettles are? never come to sussex. r u american? maybe op is a brit and we only say that stuff over here
dawhitekid15 0
you know a nettle is when a guy milks his man boob..so how did you sting urself?
0520bef 0
Ouch! One time I was on a school field trip to outdoor school and I was walking by a bunch of stinging nettles and I accidentally brushed my whole right hand and my whole arm on the nettles and I was in pain for literally an entire month. I was treating it every day, idk y it didn't stop stinging. At least I got out of my school work because I write with my right hand:)
Various33 0
I've been through worse. PS part of learning to skateboard is busting your nuts repeatedly.
theprincess79 2
Ouch! And wow totally NOT your day.
worldclassrager 41
You're slowing falling apart...looks like Mother Nature is trying to kill you off...
SailorSolaris 43
I feel your pain. I've had enough contact with stinging nettles to know that they are very painful. Also, I've hit the pavement from both bike and scooter more than once. It is rather painful.
SamySosa 10
here's to hoping an obese person sits on you ?