Today, I drug tested my son for weed. He purposely filled the cup up to the top out of spite and I got piss all over my hands. Oh, and he failed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took a drug test. Not only did I fail the drug test, but I mostly missed the sample cup and got urine all over my pants. FML
Today, I was being drug tested as part of a pre-employment policy for substitute teaching. Once I had peed in the cup enough to pass the line, I put it on the only available space: the toilet paper holder. Trying to get toilet paper, I knocked the cup over, spilling pee all over myself. FML
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, I paid for someone else's piss so that I could pass my drug test. I didn't pass the drug test. FML
Today, I had to take a drug test for a new job. I ended up spilling the cup of piss all over myself. I had to explain what had happened, then go sit in a waiting room full of disgusted-looking people, while I kept drinking water to fill my bladder back up. FML
Today, I had to take a mandatory drug test with the doctor present. Nervous, I couldn't get myself to pee in the cup right away. When I finally did, I couldn't stop myself from overfilling the cup and getting pee all over myself. FML
Today, I found out what my son has been celebrating. Apparently, his boss caught him smoking weed and fired him, then had a massive stroke and now has the IQ of a potato, so my son just kept turning up to work since his boss hadn’t had the time to tell anyone he was fired, or to fill out any paperwork. My son is scum. FML
Today, my teenage son tried to huff a can of spray paint. FML
Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML
Today, my son got in serious trouble after he was caught trying to sell weed to people in the street. The good news is that the "weed" was just actual weeds he'd pulled from our lawn. The bad news is that at age 16, my son is too stupid to know the difference. FML
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Top comments
popaulina 8
I'm all for adults smoking weed recreationally, but teens smoke weed and get lazy and their grades drop. I'm sure it's also not all teens, I smoked and still did great in school, but if this parent is testing their kid there's probably a problem. The best thing to do OP is to teach your kid to use it responsibly. Or to act like it's totally cool, and see if he just gives up on it. There's really no great parenting answer to getting your kid to stop doing drugs.
DanaeZee 18
Parents are testing their kids for drugs in the US? Sounds weird o.O Also, doesn't seem like a good way to deal with the problem itself. If your child takes drugs or you think so, you should work on the relationship so they know they can turn to you for help, not just controlling them or handing out punishment if they "fail". It's hard to work with teenagers against their will if they don't want to quit. My English is too bad to really describe what I mean :-(
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Comments (13)
superluous1987 6
who cares, its gonna be legal soon anyway
metroido 21
How are you so positive that he actually *knew* better than to fill the cup all the way?