Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, on a date, I told the guy I could swim. He suggested we race. I agreed to impress him. I jumped in, immediately panicked, inhaled water, and had to be helped out by a 10-year-old with floaties. He asked if I lied about anything else. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, I decided to get in shape for swimsuit season, so I went to the gym. I tried to lift a barbell up and over my head, which was fine, until I dropped it. Exercise earned me a concussion and a neck brace. FML
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
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Top comments
TonierShadow 19
It's perfectly fine. Just remember it is going to take you some time to get back in to things especially with more vigorous exercises like swimming. Wish you the best of luck with getting back into shape.
james_logan 19
10 lengths? That's pretty good! I would be tired after 10 lengths as well. Next time maybe after the 10 lengths take a break to catch your breath and do another 10 lengths. Never give up. Never back down. You can do it bro!
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Comments (52)
izzajaneful 24
If you want to use swimming to lose weight, you also have to be very careful of your diet. Being in water slightly lowers your body temperature, which unconsciously makes people feel more hungry. Most swimmers have to do other exercise for weight loss.
lucygwen 5
Keep going ! It feels so good to see 10 turn into 20 then 30
SarrittaRox 4
All workouts start slow. Be proud OP! You accomplished more than anyone who didn't leave the couch. Nothing wrong with going at your own pace, just remember to keep at it and don't give up. You got this!
ZombieSazza 34
Before my disability (severe nerve damage in pelvis) I started out only managing 10 lengths and built up to 15 lengths, 20 lengths, 25 lengths and then 30, and I kept to a regular 30 lengths 2-3 times a week. There is no shame in only doing 10 lengths, if that's what you can comfortably manage then that's what you can manage, and you can always build yourself up, but there's no shame in "only" managing 10 lengths, at least you're trying to stay healthy and trying to stay in shape, so congratulations on that and I wish you the best!
RealChewyPiano 18
Leeds aye? All Leeds aren't we!
im_teekay 7
I think 10 lengths is pretty good! I did something similar the other week and almost fell over from feeling woozy when I got out of the pool
IorvethTheXolo 8
Hey, as someone who used to be overweight, who cares what you can do now? You're out there bettering yourself and, as you get into better and better shape, you'll be able to swim for longer and longer. EVERYONE, man and animal, that is out of shape, starts out slow. You don't take an overweight, out of shape dog out on a 5 mile hike his first day out. You start with a brisk walk around the block and go from there. You don't take an out of shape horse and hop on him and go jump a cross country course or on an all day trail ride. You start close to home and build his endurance and muscle up. Just like that, you start out with 10 lengths in the pool and build up from there over time. Plus, swimming has the benefit of being easy on your joints. You're one step ahead of everyone out there who hates their extra weight, but isn't doing anything about it.
dracolich 27
10?! I get tired after half of one! Good on you for exercising.
Light_My_Afire 6
Swimming is hard! I run, so in the winter when the roads get to bad and I can't run, I swim. I try too, but it's damn hard! And I use a kickboard so I'm not even using my whole body.
Weezlerox 1
So you feel bad for spending "only 15 minutes" in the pool? That is about 15 minutes more than a lot of other people exercise for..... Start small with exercise routines and build up as you go along, and never feel obliged to do more than you are comfortable with. Full respect to you for what you have already achieved, and kudos to the lifeguard for making sure you were OK instead if posing and eyeing up other people :)