Today, I decided to get back in shape so I went swimming. I only managed 10 lengths and was completely out of breath. I was so embarrassed that when a lifeguard asked me if I was OK, I made up a story about a leg injury as a reason to leave only 15 minutes after I got in. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML
Today, I was in swimming practice at the pool. I suddenly got breathless, dizzy, and felt like I was drowning. I cried out to the instructor, telling him I had a weak heart. He shouted back, "I don't care about your love life! Swim, bitch!" FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, on a date, I told the guy I could swim. He suggested we race. I agreed to impress him. I jumped in, immediately panicked, inhaled water, and had to be helped out by a 10-year-old with floaties. He asked if I lied about anything else. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML
Today, I decided to get in shape for swimsuit season, so I went to the gym. I tried to lift a barbell up and over my head, which was fine, until I dropped it. Exercise earned me a concussion and a neck brace. FML
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
TonierShadow 19
It's perfectly fine. Just remember it is going to take you some time to get back in to things especially with more vigorous exercises like swimming. Wish you the best of luck with getting back into shape.
james_logan 19
10 lengths? That's pretty good! I would be tired after 10 lengths as well. Next time maybe after the 10 lengths take a break to catch your breath and do another 10 lengths. Never give up. Never back down. You can do it bro!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (52)
Kramer1998 20
As long as you keep making progress, stick with it an push yourself to do better each time, you'll be shocked at what you achieve
Theater_Chef_3 30
Hell, I've been a competitive swimmer since I was about 5, but recently I had to take a 4 month break and now that I'm back at it, 10 lengths is a struggle. We're both on the same boat, just keep working at it and pushing yourself, but don't be embarrassed to take a break. Being out of shape isn't that big of a deal especially if you're working to improve yourself
MrGarrett26 11
don't be embarrassed. get your fat butt back in and swim more. they know that's why you are there. no need to feel upset
Jessmuss 3
Same thing happened to me but I was the only person at the pool and the lifeguard was just sitting there. So after 15 mins of trying to swim some laps I awkwardly left
huffersheffer 3
hey! you got out there and did something! be proud honey!
KimmyCupZ 21
I'm sure that the life guard wouldn't judge you for doing something good for yourself. I'm also pretty sure he sees people wanting to get into shape quite often.
Nezah 6
10 straight laps while swimming is actually pretty good. Keep trying.
LadyTyger51ne 8
At least you started to get back in shape and you're beating everyone that's on the couch. Be proud of yourself!
McFishFilet 9
To be honest, swimming is not the exercise to start on. Try running, curls, and push-ups/sit-ups. Then begin swimming. Swimming works every muscle, so it's not the best workout to start with.
MikaykayUnicorn 36
Sadly OP probably won't try again because they were embarrassed for being tired so quickly. Everyone starts somewhere. Those 10 laps will turn into 15, then 20, then 25, then 30 up until you can do a hundred laps without feeling a thing. You just have to keep going. Don't be embarrassed. There's nothing embarrassing about trying to stay healthy.