Today, I can no longer leave my son at daycare, because at the age of 5, he's started manipulating the girls there into fighting over him. A kid lost a baby tooth in one such brawl. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML
Today, I caught my son trying to punch his own teeth out so he'd get more money from the tooth fairy. FML
Today, I received a call from child care. Apparently, my four year-old boy tried to start a mosh pit during naptime. FML
Today, my child was refusing to leave the playground. I had to pry her, screaming and crying, from the monkey bars. I then realized I had been assaulting someone else's kid. FML
Today, I picked up my four year old son from daycare. As I was putting him in his car seat, I asked him if he had fun. He yelled, "Shut it, bitch!" FML
Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML
Today, my son trained his little sister to walk up to strangers and whimper: "My mommy punches me." FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, I was asked to take care of my 3 year-old little brother. After 15 minutes of him screaming and me trying to keep him entertained, he started throwing his toy cars at me. He hit me in the mouth, and I started to bleed. My parents yelled at me for "not controlling him." FML
Today, I took my son to the playground and watched him have fun. Minutes later, I was being shoved around and called a pedophile because I was there alone with no wife. By the time I convinced them I was innocent, my son was bawling. FML
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Top comments
RainbowDashie140 12
Playboy level: Your Son
Marty20612 5
Lol that's funny:) He's already a lady's man
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Comments (132)
Omniprism 15
You have one smart cookie on your hands. I'd start cultivating that in a positive and good way some how. And maybe a little therapy just in case.
mattyiscool123 26
Alriiight!
bvilleg 4
He got game
fmaae82 12
Pimp in the making
gamegeek42 6
I am proud of him for you! That is awesome!
captainsparkle 6
A child's behavior directly reflects how they have been raised. YDI...
Joshuology 3
LittleLAD
Fsvb 32
I know it seems funny and all and I agree it is if this doesn't happen often or more than once, but if it does happen more often this could be a real problem. Perhaps he is very intelligent and needs stimulation or some personality disorder.. But it could just be this one time.
Spazz420 7
I picked YDI because he had to learn it somewhere and being 5 it's probly his parents : S
Becca1967 1
Leave him be. He's learning and will shortly face little girls manipulating him. The circle of Life...