Today, I called my ex boyfriend to tell him that not only am I still in love with him, I'm also three months pregnant with his child. Upon hearing the news, he swore, called me a pathetic liar, swore some more, and hung up on me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML
Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML
Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Today, I accidentally got pregnant by my boyfriend of three years and now I’m 4 months pregnant, single and we don’t even talk anymore. The best part is that he doesn’t believe I’m pregnant, nor that it’s his. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML
Today, I met my ex, who told me he had something very important to tell me. I thought he was about to tell me that his girlfriend is pregnant (a fact I already knew). He told me that he still loves me and he'd never stopped. FML
Today, my ex showed up at my doorstep, claiming to be pregnant with my baby. Of course, I pointed out we broke up ten months ago and hadn't seen each other again until just now, and she is currently six months along. She actually admitted to my face that she figured I'd be too stupid to put the pieces together. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
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Top comments
ImaginaryFoe 1
FYL but what did you expect? Did you think he might say he's been missing you, didn't have the courage to call, and can't wait to be a real family of three? Time to put your big girl knickers on, dear. Grow up. You don't have the luxury of lounging in self-pity at the moment since you have some big decisions to make. I hope things work out well for you. Don't count on anybody giving you a "happily ever after" ending.
Thecarpaltunnelo 0
That sucks. Be glad you're not with him anymore, he sounds like a prick.
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Comments (293)
zellybo15 0
honestly... how did you expect him to react?
fioirene 4
Omg i feel so bad for u. Get an abortion . Jk don't. Make him feel the baby
bcan 3
What did you expect? He dumped you for a reason. Getting pregnant wont bring him back.
Lasagnaa 24
What a dick! Op, you're better off without him.
charlottegurrl 9
Phgjuduifgiiufy
The_9th_Doctor 18
better get his ass for child support now before he skips the state
fantasyworld 39
He'll find out you were telling the truth when he misses child support payments.