Today, I was feeling confident, so I rented a cabana at the beach and put on my best swimsuit. I was at the bar when suddenly the stool gave way under me. I was drenched in Mojito and a bunch of spring breakers laughed at me, making fat jokes. I spent the rest of the day crying in the cabana. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as a restaurant hostess, I fell into the fountain at work while carrying a high chair in front of several large parties, who all promptly laughed at me. We were so busy, I had to stay and finish my shift soaking wet. FML
Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML
Today, I woke up with my face covered in blood. Turns out that yesterday at my colleague's birthday party, I got so drunk that I started yelling "Nappy time!" before falling out of my hammock and face-first onto the concrete ground. FML
Today, after a night of drinking, I woke up in the hospital with a broken coccyx. Apparently, my drunk self came to the glorious conclusion that it would be a good idea to cannonball into a puddle while screaming "POOLPARTYYYY!" at the top of my lungs. FML
Today, I was swimming in the ocean with my best friend and a giant wave came and knocked off the bottom of my bikini. My friend told me that she would go get another bottom so I could walk onto the very crowded beach. She left me for half an hour, laughing from the shore with her entire family. FML
Today, while at a night club, I was wearing a brand new outfit that I absolutely loved. I was enjoying myself until I felt something wet drop onto my head and body from above. It was puke from a drunk guy in the V.I.P. section. FML
Today, we were hanging around the pool with a couple of friends and a crush of mine. Thinking I would be able to impress her with a well-performed dive off the diving board, I went up and attempted my best dive. I slipped as I jumped, hitting my head on the board. I had to be saved by the lifeguard. FML
Today, I went tanning on the beach. I found a nice spot close to shore and laid there with my towel and sunglasses. A few hours later, I awoke to waves splashing at me. My towel was soaked and my sunglasses must have washed off the shore. Damn high tide. FML
Today, I went to my first university party already a little drunk. I perched on the end of a table to cool off from the dancing and the whole table tipped over and dumped me onto the floor. I was promptly laughed out of the room. FML
Today, at the beach, I swam pretty far out into the ocean. I ended up getting pummelled by the waves and got a painful cramp in my leg. The whole beach watched me flail and scream, while my friends rolled their eyes as they dragged me out of the water. FML
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Top comments
slhiggx 17
We cannot control what people say or do to us. But we can control our reactions. This is a tough, traumatizing experience. But don’t let it bring you down anymore than it already has. Accept and love yourself the way you are, & always improve upon it.
core01 30
Notch the legs of all the bar stools so the spring brakers fall on their asses too
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Comments (3)
slhiggx 17
We cannot control what people say or do to us. But we can control our reactions. This is a tough, traumatizing experience. But don’t let it bring you down anymore than it already has. Accept and love yourself the way you are, & always improve upon it.
core01 30
Notch the legs of all the bar stools so the spring brakers fall on their asses too
CowgirlWithHeart 16
Im sorry that happened to you, don't let them bother you too much. Honestly, even if you are fat (and I say that as a genuine "if" because we humans often have flawed views of our bodies, just because a bar stool broke doesn't mean you are fat, especially on a beach the salt water mist can damage things) there are far worse things that people could be. Not only that but at least in America we have literal scientists that are hired by food companies to make our food addictive to us, and our bodies are designed to store the fat for emergencies, it's not your fault but even if it were, there are so many worse things that you could be.