Today, I called my ex boyfriend to tell him that not only am I still in love with him, I'm also three months pregnant with his child. Upon hearing the news, he swore, called me a pathetic liar, swore some more, and hung up on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I called my ex and told him I was pregnant with his child. He was thrilled, going on and on about how much he wanted to be a dad. I had to tell him I was going to abort it. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that I'm pregnant. He instantly replied "Bullshit!", then hung up and apparently skipped town. FML
Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML
Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML
Today, my ex called, saying she's 3 months pregnant. She seems to have forgotten that we haven't been in the same room, much less friends, in over a year. My dimwitted wife thinks the baby is mine. FML
Today, I accidentally got pregnant by my boyfriend of three years and now I’m 4 months pregnant, single and we don’t even talk anymore. The best part is that he doesn’t believe I’m pregnant, nor that it’s his. FML
Today, my ex-boyfriend called my parents to let them know I broke up with him. He was sobbing. FML
Today, I met my ex, who told me he had something very important to tell me. I thought he was about to tell me that his girlfriend is pregnant (a fact I already knew). He told me that he still loves me and he'd never stopped. FML
Today, my ex showed up at my doorstep, claiming to be pregnant with my baby. Of course, I pointed out we broke up ten months ago and hadn't seen each other again until just now, and she is currently six months along. She actually admitted to my face that she figured I'd be too stupid to put the pieces together. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML
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Top comments
ImaginaryFoe 1
FYL but what did you expect? Did you think he might say he's been missing you, didn't have the courage to call, and can't wait to be a real family of three? Time to put your big girl knickers on, dear. Grow up. You don't have the luxury of lounging in self-pity at the moment since you have some big decisions to make. I hope things work out well for you. Don't count on anybody giving you a "happily ever after" ending.
Thecarpaltunnelo 0
That sucks. Be glad you're not with him anymore, he sounds like a prick.
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Comments (293)
ScrabbleBabe2010 0
141 I agree! 148 that would be convenient but it is illegal in at least some states to tamper with the mailbox or stick things in it not from the P.O.
boatkicker 5
So then mail it to him. Postage is only 44 cents. If that breaks the bank, than you've got things to worry about that are far more serious than whose child it is. Child support wont cover everything that baby needs.
sallen0046 4
Were you really expecting a magical happy ending here? If you're not still in a relationship, there's usually a pretty good reason for it, and being pregnant doesn't make all the problems you had before just disappear. It creates entirely new issues. This is a lot to throw on anyone, especially someone you're no longer with.
jmasters 0
I'm sorry forgive me?
rcooper311 0
what the crap was that about!
brootalxkeni 0
YDI for having pre marital sex.
blackbettybamf 0
I think we have the same ex. He disappeared after we had that conversation. Our daughter is 9 weeks old.
RufusCade 7
Stupid bee-atch! NEVER give a man more than one piece of bad news at a time.
latingringa 3
you don't need a guy like that to be your babydaddy welcome to the single mom club!
silentsir15 0
this why u cum on the face not inside!!!
bellaamariee 0
haha exactly! :)
talktomandybaby 8
why would you do it over the phone anyways?