Today, I biked 15 km to my girlfriend's house in really heavy rain to surprise her. Turns out she's on holiday in Spain, and hadn't bothered to tell me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I snuck out to go see my girlfriend. When I got to her house, I left my bike out front and we went on a nice walk around the block. We passed a homeless-looking woman going the opposite way. About ten minutes later, the same woman passed us, on my bike. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my long distance girlfriend by flying to her unannounced. When I arrived at her house, her family tells me that she herself boarded an unannounced flight to where I lived hours ago. Surprise. FML
Today, I got off work early to go home and surprise my girlfriend with lunch, only to come home to her in the middle of packing up all of her stuff. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I told her best friend the plan the day before. I got reservations to a restaurant on the beach, and we were going to arrive via boat. She never showed. Her parents called me asking why she left town to go to Paris. FML
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
Today, I waited in the pouring rain for my wife to come pick me up from work. It was only after I was thoroughly drenched that I remembered it was my wife's day off, and that I drove myself to work earlier in her car, which was parked fifty feet from where I was waiting. FML
Today, I drove three hours to surprise my girlfriend, who I hadn't seen in three weeks. When she opened the door, she gasped, told me to fuck off, and slammed the door in my face. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went for a ride on bicycles. After a while, I couldn't see him ahead of me any more. I went back and forth for half an hour but could't find him, and started to think something happened. I went home to call him but saw his bike. Turns out my boyfriend is just an asshole. FML
Today, I walked 6 miles to see my girlfriend. After 5 and a half miles, she broke up with me because I never visit her. FML
Today, my wife suddenly texted me to meet her halfway between our house and the supermarket. I immediately put my shoes on and started walking, eager to get to her as fast as I could to surprise her. Turns out she was carrying three heavy bags and yelled at me for being slow and by foot. FML
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Top comments
ArmedcrackerR6 8
There's your sign.
muchagente 5
keep on biking! the nearer you get to spain the better the weather will become. now i'm in a romantic mood for the rest of the day. sigh.
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Comments (116)
TheMadScientist 13
15km in a rain? Why?
IndiRae 9
Not to surprise his girlfriend like he said, that's for sure.
bignate222 1
obviously to get laid...
baygirl564 9
i'm sorry....
kaya1234 0
Boys... You should really listen to us when we talk :)
lolololer 8
im pretty sure he said that his girlfriend hadnt bothered to tell him that she went to Spain...
kaya1234 0
What kind of girl doesn't mention a holiday...?
TheComputerGuy96 16
She's definitely cheating on you.
zane631 0
who uses km
vickycat 5
Pretty much UK and USA are the only people who really use miles anymore. Dick.
The_Great_Zucchi 15
People who like real numbers obviously...
Spanika87 0
Us Australians do!!
koe4 0
25 - Canada?
MangoRico1 1
Maybe that's a little hint on how she feels
Mirorbo 27
You should have called or texted her ahead of time, darling. Surprises are nice, but there was no promise of her being home either way. She could have been been at work, out with friends, or out shopping for all you knew.
VeganVampyre 27
Unless he knew her schedule, and knew that she would be home (on a normal day, of course, when she hasn't gone off to Spain without notice). Maybe she never goes out after dinner, and he went to surprise her at 7 pm or something.
Xero3g 5
I can tell you right now, your relationship is not going to last.
raphanne_fml 33
You think?
bigtaytay 13
I thought this was gonna end with u catching her cheating. At least that wasn't the case, be happy about that
Tymax 0
Is she catholic, cuz if she is she's probably at WYD, I'm going to so I'll tell her you said hello