Today, I began to choke on a large pill while my mom was in the room. Hoping that she would help me, I began to make a lot of noise. After she completely ignored me, I threw my body over a chair, saving my life. At this point my mother asks me to shut up because she can't hear her friend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had one of the worst panic attacks in years. I was worried nobody cared about me and that I had completely messed up my life. I was hyperventilating and crying hysterically. My mom walked by my room, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make those noises, at least shut the door." FML
Today, while sitting next to my mom at a restaurant, she told me to stop moving and making so much noise because, "It's distracting." The noise I was making was me breathing. I'm not even allowed to breathe. Guess I'll die. FML
Today, I crawled into my mom's room to tell her my stomach was in massive pain. She ended up throwing me out of the room while spraying me with Lysol. My appendix was about to burst and I needed surgery. FML
Today, while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML
Today, I went to Walmart with my mom. At the checkout line I was eating a bag of chips as my mom bought her stuff. I inhaled while eating and I started to choke. The cashier asked me if I was OK. My mom just waved her hand, and said, "Sometimes she does that for attention, ignore her." FML
Today, I was singing while lying upside down chewing gum. My dad was trying to focus on the current football game and hushed me. I yelled, "No!" resulting in my gum becoming lodged in my windpipe. I shut up after all. FML
Today, I was drinking from a water bottle while in a lecture. The water caught in my throat and it felt like I was choking to death. Instead of asking me if I was okay or trying to help, the guy sitting next to me told me to shut up. FML
Today, my daughter wanted to show me the tooth she had just lost. As I was in a rush to leave for work, I quickly picked up and swallowed my pill that was on the kitchen table. It was only until I looked back down at the table did I see not only my pill, but one extremely angry daughter glaring at me. FML
Today, I choked on oatmeal, watered-down soupy oatmeal. It seemed to get stuck halfway down. I chucked up several spoonfuls. My wife was oblivious to all the noise I was making because she had her over-the-ear headphones on, listening to some stupid YouTube video. FML
Today, my mother took a bunch of sleeping pills, then went driving. I followed her and dialed 911. Now she thinks that I was "trying to get her arrested," and she refuses to talk to me ever again. FML
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Top comments
Phalankx 0
Shoulda played dead for a while
plaidrabbit 0
I'm going to assume that by "making a lot of noise," you meant banging on stuff and maybe throwing something, because if you were vocalizing, you weren't really choking. But still, I know how scary that feeling is, and it sucks your mom was a bitch about it.
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Comments (189)
bballman3113 0
false
Superman1993 0
omg that happen to me too my brother had to yell at my mom to get her to help me
spazley 0
I've been there..
k1o2a3l4a5 0
haha 63..
yosh_x3 0
zomg that sorter sucks oO ; maybe she thought you joking around ? Well you should tell her you were choking ; & she'll probs feel bad o_o
saveourplanet 0
We should have a Bitchy Mom category for FML's...there are so many.
IrishEyes 0
I didn't read everybody's comments (so I hope I'm not repeating) and on the off chance one of you might read it....I CALL BULLSHIT. I don't think that happened at all and you just made up a story to get on FML. You threw yourself over a chair? Do you think we live in a TV show? You were making noise? If you were choking you couldn't make noise b/c your airway would be cut off. No Air = No Noise And no mother is THAT cruel. Even a mom with munchausen syndrome would want to save their child just so they could be in the limelight.
NoEscape89 0
argh i hate that, my mother's been that way with me lately completely ignoring me then paying attention when its not even needed >_
StarGirl11 0
Dang that sucks for you. And to everyone who says you can't choke on a pill. Well you've never obviously seen some of the larger pills before. Some pills are extremely hard to swallow depending on the person. Some have easier time with them then others. Also don't believe in such large pill sizes. Go to Google Images and type in 'large pill'. Oh and number 81 when you don't have a person to help you that's actually the proper manner to try unobstruct the object in your mouth. Just a little recommendation to the OP from someone who has had problems herself with pill sizes. If you are going to be permanently on this pill I would recommend getting a pill chopper. Helped me a lot when I was post-op from a surgery and it would probably help you from having this happen again just in case.
ShadowlessSilenc 1
It isn't the proper method if you can't get help. Technically there isn't an official one but this was more likely to do harm than good. The best thing you can do is stand with your back against a wall and punch youself upwards from the ribcage or pull out whatever is choking you (difficult for a pill but it is very difficult to literally choke on a pill). Both of these methods suck and are nowhere near as good as getting help but they don't suck as much as the OP's actions (not a criticism, prolly hard to think straight).
elnorris14 19
Punching yourself when you are choking is not the right thing to do, not enough force behind it. First it would be hard to punch yourself hard enough to dislodge something. Second, you do need to do the Heimlich on yourself pretty much by throwing yourself at something hard enough to dislodge it. Yes you may injur yourself, but it would be better than dying. The same as getting injured during CPR better to be alive and injured than dead.
StarGirl11 0
Sorry I meant 80.