Today, I asked my mum when she gets the urge to smoke. The answer I was looking for was "After I eat" or maybe even "When I'm tired." What I got was "Every second since you were born." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML
Today, my mother tried to tell me that nicotine is the only substance that ensures weight loss, and that nicotine has been passed down in our family for over 5 generations of heavy smoking relatives. Then she encouraged me to start smoking. FML
Today, I overheard my mom, who quit smoking years ago, saying that I am the only person who stresses her out badly enough to want to smoke a cigarette. I have never once tried to stress her out, and in fact I do everything I can to make her life easier. She works in retail. FML
Today, I learned that my mother almost did a perfect job being a parent when I was a baby. She was clean during the 9 month period I was in the womb. Unfortunately, she stopped right after giving birth to me, celebrated, and started smoking again. I was breastfed. FML
Today, my mother called me and told me that she went to the hospital. This wasn't a surprise 'cos she normally goes to the hospital for the smallest things. I was a smartass and asked, "What now? You finally have lung cancer from all those cigarettes?" Apparently, she does. FML
Today, my mother told me I'm going to get lung cancer. Because she smokes. FML
Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML
Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML
Today, while driving me to the hospital because I was having an asthma attack, my mother lit a cigarette. FML
Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML
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Top comments
drewflav 17
What's with the string of nasty parents we've been getting? If you don't want kids, don't have them!
buckeyed 20
Sorry OP. Maybe she stopped for her pregnancy and craved it immediately after. Or is lamenting the way her body changed.
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Comments (78)
gabagabaheyu 10
she shouldnt have gotten pregnant then! what a bitch to blame you for being born.
JMichael 26
Hopefully she was joking OP. I asked my mom once what was the best thing that happened to her. She said the day I moved out of her house. Of course she was joking.
Nolimit2217 32
I know that feeling.. . The urge to smoke due to having kids never ceases
Toast7 6
In my experience, some smokers (or just people in general) seem to get irritated, or insulted quickly when you question them on their bad habit, or if you keep pointing out their flaws. Therefore, despite that OP's question may have been spurred purely out of curiosity, and not as a means to set up for some degrading speech on her willingness to continue smoking regardless that it clearly a bad decision, she could have taken it that way and automatically responded with something insulting in return. I mean, we don't have the entire picture, it could be exactly as it appears and she sincerely meant what she said, but the scenario could have played out like this instead. at least that's what if looks like to me anyway.
Autumnsbeing 9
No wonder that smokers get irritated. I don't know how many times I have heard people ask other people 'so why are you smoking' and 'why don't you stop?'. I wonder how these people would react if you would say everytime they drink alcohol "Why do you drink? Don't you know that one glass kills thousands of brain connections? Or do you just like it when your liver works overtime?" I don't think OP's mother is bad. A lot of smokers smoke because they have stress. And children are stressful.
smokecloud_ 37
I'm with you.. I smoke (no kids thank goodness) and when people tell me it's bad for me and I should quit, I just tell them not minding their own damn business is bad for them and they should quit. Win, win, no?
vencku 13
You can smoke as much as you want in your own home, as far as I care. But I don't want my allergy to kick up because of your smoke when you go out in public. If someone drinks alcohol, his liver and brain are affected. Not yours. When you smoke, you affect the people around you. That's the problem.
DanielleinDC 34
Well, your right to smoke ends where my nostrils begin. If someone is drinking in front of me, it doesn't affect me. If someone is eating something disgustingly unhealthy, it doesn't affect me much (although I find the smells of certain foods repulsive). But if you're smoking in my general vicinity, it's going to affect my ability to breathe. And second-hand smoke does harm others.
Dinoporeon 9
Tell her to take that giant stick, that's making her cranky, out of her ass.
oly49 10
well that escalate pretty quick
tyler22waters 8
It's ok, my dad told me he was gonna have to get on some pills for his nerves because I made his anxiety really bad and smoking just wouldn't cut it anymore.
smokecloud_ 37
Tell him there's something else he can smoke that will take care of his anxiety. :D
BigMac92 11
Damn OP, that's a punch in the face. Though, nicotine addicts are usually hostile like that. Deep down she loves you but the drug is clouding up her mind.
vencku 13
This surprises you? Smoking harms smoker ànd the people around. Of course non-smokers are concerned for their health. Is causing damage to other people not hostile? Or does the damage not count because it's not instantly visible like a bruise? Hitting someone is wrong, clogging up their lungs isn't?
outoftown 27
The very next cig immediately changes the lung tissue of everyone who inhales it. The change is NOT for the better.
jakeysmom 12
I'm sorry OP. That's an incredibly nasty thing to say to your child. I hope she was just teasing you and she apologizes.