Today, I asked my mum why she never had any children after me. She scoffed and asked if I've looked in a mirror lately. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mother told me to my face that if she could do it all over again, she wouldn't have had kids. Thanks, Mum. It's not like I asked to be born. FML
Today, I asked my mom if I was ugly. She said, "Ask your girlfriend." I said I didn't have one. She said "Exactly." FML
Today, my mother looked me dead in the face and said, "I have failed as a parent." FML
Today, my mum asked when she's getting grandkids. I had to tell her that, at 21 years-old, I hadn't even managed to get a boyfriend yet. FML
Today, my mom asked me out of the blue if I was ever going to consider getting married. It wasn't until after the conversation ended that I remembered my siblings are all either single like I am, or incapable of having children. I am my mother's last hope of becoming a grandma, and she reminds me all the time. FML
Today, feeling very self-conscious about my looks, I told my mom I felt ugly and wished I could be as beautiful as her. She only said, "Yeah, I'm pretty, I wonder what happened to you." FML
Today, I asked my mom why nobody likes me. She reeled off about a dozen reasons. FML
Today, a woman asked why my daughter doesn't look remotely like me. I just smiled and shrugged it off, but the truth is that she looks exactly like I did before I got my botched plastic surgery. FML
Today, my 5-year-old daughter said "Mommy, why doesn't anyone wanna marry you?" I've been asking myself the same question for all too many years. FML
Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML
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Top comments
ImWhiteBoy_WhoRU 10
She's kind of insulting herself too by saying that...
toughchick14 15
I'm sure your beautiful OP. or at least on the inside.
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Comments (90)
toughchick14 15
I'm sure your beautiful OP. or at least on the inside.
puggypark 14
#1 is right OP. You are beautiful outside and inside.
matthewesparza12 13
Unless your Adolf hitler, he was ugly on the inside and out but I'm pretty sure your beautiful c:
Welshite 40
#1: I've always found kidneys to be particularly attractive.
Shrike 24
Wow, 25. I guess that's what they mean when they talk about "grammar that only a mother could love."
Ian7890 23
I'm sure most people know the difference, they just don't care. This is fml, it really doesn't matter.
TheCanucklehead 22
'Your' absolutely right 41. Jokes. 'Your' wrong
Axipiter 24
38, I've stopped trying. Their going to continue with it. You're opinion doesn't matter. Apparently most people have failed third grade.
toughchick14 15
Apparently you failed the third grade too 57. It's they're not their.
Axipiter 24
Apparently sarcasm isn't very well translated. I apologize. I intentionally misspelled "they're" and "your". I don't consider myself a "grammar Nazi", but those two really piss me off.
toughchick14 15
Oh and you also mixed you're and your up, so 57 I hope that helps you realize that it was just a harmless mistake that anyone can make because intelligent people who have pass the third grade can make.
evilplatypus 39
I love how 25 is apparently a terrible person for mixing up your and you're but nobody pointed out #1 messed it up as well...
Axipiter 24
64, that's what I was trying to get across... But once again, subtlety has failed me...
rocker_chick105 31
Jeez 61 what crawled up your ass and died?
matthewesparza12 13
64 your awesome :)
ImWhiteBoy_WhoRU 10
She's kind of insulting herself too by saying that...
PterodactylMan 23
Every Action has a Reaction
King_paradox 22
That was the point #2
Koppol 15
Yes, considering she contributed half in creating her "ugly child".
1PersonIsMyWorld 22
Ya op.. your moms a bitch. Blow her off and just KNOW you're one hot sexy mofo. :)
slappygecko 21
"I INHERITED IT FROM YOU MOM."
jessicaf10 7
The apple does not fall far from the tree.
longlivemetal911 15
"..I got it from my momma!"
Olympiakos10 15
What happened to "A face only a mother could love"?
Zimmington 21
That's right above a personality only FML commenters can love
CaptFuzzyNippl_2 16
Her Tummy probably looks like half inflated balloon.
JBChristian 47
Oh that makes me feel better doc.
BjgUsername 12
I read this in Dr. Phil's voice
DocBastard 40
You son of a...oh, wait a second... *checks OP's gender* You daughter of a...
TourettesGuyFTW 26
In Arnie's voice? (can't remember the film)
laden_swallow09 35
9- You thinking of Predator? Not the right context, here.
confusedAsFuck 34
Did she look at the mirror too?
hdisnfjs91 21
I always tell my Dad he got the perfect child the first time around that's why he never went for more...not so sure he agrees 😂
MissMustard 20
I wouldn't worry OP, that response is more a show of her cold nature than your appearance!
aklm15 14
Well think like this; she basically called herself and your father ugly too.
Zimmington 21
Haven't you heard that ugly parents have cute kids
TheDrifter 24
Quite true. Some of the prettiest people I have seen came out of a lucky combination from 2 rather unattractive people. And some of the oddest looking were just unfortunate combinations from 2 normal looking people.
theorangecurls 18
It's ok op! She was more insulting herself than you!
WiseGuy79 14
Clearly a badly tainted uterus... Be glad you made it out alive haha